Monday Niteraw - March 22, 2010

Monday NiteRaw - March 22, 2010

Jesse King - Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Monday NiteRaw! I’m Jesse King!

Tim Hoss - And I’m Gorilla Tim Hoss.

Jesse King - We have a huge card tonight, including the semifinals of the Tournament of Honor!

Tim Hoss - Tonight, we‘ll find out which two men will go on to battle for the Championship of Honor at Saved by the Bell!

Jesse King - Also tonight, we have Sparks battling Koda, as well as a match between Inspector Shetty and Mr. Quintana Roo.

Tim Hoss - Not only that, but we have two big main events! First, The Truth Coalition takes on the two men who will clash next week for the Hardcore and Inter-Forum titles, The Boiler Room Brawler and “Damn Right“ Jackson!

Jesse King - And last week, Little Naitch was announced as the next challenger for the WWCF World Heavyweight Championship. Tonight, he teams with Tyfo and an unnamed partner to take on Heavy Metal Hollywood in our main event!


Tournament of Honor Semifinal Match: Jazzman V. The Smokin‘ Vokoun

Tim Hoss: Jess, I don't know how to call this matchup. Everyone has picked Jazzman to win this whole tournament, but there is this unknown force that has put us all in for a loop.

Jesse King: If by loop, you mean loopy...as in Smokin Vokoun, who is a tad bit loopy, Gorilla.

Tim Hoss: Yeah...a "tad" bit loopy. He is the new kid on the block compared to the other three guys. However, I think he has just a good shot as any to win this whole thing. But he has to get through the former World Champion. Take it away Michael!!

Michael Muffer: Ladies and Gentleman, the following contest...is set for one fall...and it is a TOURNAMENT OF HONOR SEMI FINAL MATCH!!!

*Hope*

Michael Muffer: Introducing first, from Fulton, New York. Weighing in a 206 pounds....JAZZMAN!!

Jazzman enters the arena with a very mixed reaction. He gets loud boos as well as some cheers. He looks around the arena and enters the ring.

Tim Hoss: It's been well documented that Jazzman, might have a new attitude. He's trying to prove that he is a man of honor. However, while some people believe him others are skeptical.

Michael Muffer: And his opponent....

*Sinnerman*

The crowd pops loudly, but then changes into loud boos.

Michael Muffer: Along with his manager, Xavian Gunn. From Chicago, Illinois, weighing in at 280 pounds....SMOKIN VOKOUN!!!

Vokoun stops in the middle of the ramp to glare at the crowd with those crazy serial killer eyes. He screams at the crowd to stop booing him, but it only gets louder. He gets into the ring and glares at Jazzman.

Jesse King: Man, Gorilla. Vokoun looks intense tonight. Of course he's intense every night.

Tim Hoss: And he's nuttier than a fruitcake every night as well. I like that he screams for people to not boo him. But the boos just keep getting louder.

The two lock up to start.Smokin Vokoun shoves Jazzman down, proving to be the stronger of the two. Vokoun laughs while Jazzman just smiles.

Tim Hoss: This should be a very interesting contest. Vokoun hasn't faced a man as technically skilled as Jazzman, and Jazzman has not seen anyone as insane before.

The two lock up again, but this time Jazzman does a go behind into a drop toe hold, bringing Vokoun off his feet and applying an armbar. He wrentches on the right arm as Vokoun screams in pain. Jazzman, then takes Vokoun's arm and drops three knees on it.

Jesse King: Jazzman, one of the smartest men in WWCF. He realizes that if he can damage that hand and arm of Smokin Vokoun, that deadly Mandible Claw will not be as effective.

Tim Hoss: Jess, Jazzman is the first guy I've seen to try and do that. He's really studied Vokoun.

Smokin Vokoun, rakes the eyes to gain control. Vokoun then starts hitting Jazzman with heavy fists and forearms. He then shoots him into the ropes and goes for a lariat, but Jazzman ducks under. Jazzman then rebounds and hits a flying body press and goes for a quick cover.

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Vokoun, powers out of the cover. Then Jazzman goes back to the arm of Smokin Vokoun. He goes from an armbar to a hammerlock and then drops another knee on the arm. Xavian Gunn jaws at Jazzman but Jazzman has total concentration for the moment.

Tim Hoss: Xavian Gunn, what a self righteous prick. Blaming all of his and Smokin Vokoun's problems on everyone else but themselves. It sickens me.

Jesse King: Oh come one Gorilla, the world is a cruel place. Some people handle it better than others. Beating people up can be very therapeutic.

Jazzman then picks up Vokoun, but Vokoun counters with a kick to the gut which breaks the armbar. He then starts punching Jazzman again, he shoots him into the ropes. He goes for a lariat again, Jazzman ducks again. But on the rebound, Vokoun catches Jazzman with a vicious Belly to Belly suplex.

Tim Hoss: Jess, Smokin Vokoun is one of those wrestlers, that when he hits a move,all momentum swings to him.

Jesse King: After all that by Jazzman, and Smokin Vokoun just snatched up all the momentum.

Vokoun, finally gaining control, drops a knee on Jazzman's forehead and puts Jazzman into a chin lock. He drops a few knees into Jazzman's back and wrentches of the chin lock. Vokoun then throws a few stiff forearms on the sternum of Jazzman.


Vokoun picks up Jazzman and throws him into the turnbuckle. Vokoun charges at Jazzman, he Jazz moved and Vokoun hits face first into the turnbuckles. Now Jazzman is a house of fire as he starts throwing right hands at Smokin Vokoun. He tries to shoot Vokoun into the other turnbuckles, but Vokoun reverses. Vokoun charges at Jazzman again, but Jazz moves again. But this time, Vokoun catches himself, turns around and gives Jazzman a STIFF lariat. Vokoun taunts to the crowd and then goes for the cover.

1
2
KICKOUT!!!

Tim Hoss: I've never seen that before!! I didn't know who would gain control after all of that.

Jesse King: And it's pretty obvious who won that one, Gorilla.

Jazzman is really dazed after that lariat and Vokoun takes advantage. He shoots Jazzman into the ropes and picks up Jazz for The Samoan Drop and hits it. He goes for the cover.

1
2
KICKOUT!!!

Vokoun then picks up Jazzman who is just standing there limp. Vokoun laughs at him and taunts the crowd. Vokoun then goes for a Running Neck Breaker and hits it. He goes for a cover.

1
2
PULL UP

Vokoun didn't want to finish him off.

Jesse King: Gorilla, that was a huge mistake by Smokin Vokoun. You can't let a guy like Jazzman back into this match.

Tim Hoss: He wants to punish Jazzman here. Though with a chance to go the finals are on the line, that is not a good idea.

Vokoun tries to go for the Mandible Claw, but Jazzman fights it. Jazzman then punches Vokoun in the gut and hits the Reverse STO, to a HUGE pop from the crowd. He goes for the cover.

1
2
KICKOUT

Jazzman waits for Vokoun to just get to his knees. He sees this and shoots into the ropes and hits a STIFF Yakzua Kick right in Vokoun face. Vokoun looks like he's out cold and Jazzman goes for the cover.

1
2
KICKOUT!!!

Tim Hoss: WHO THE HELL DID VOKOUN KICK OUT OF THAT!!! That shot looked like it knocked him.

Jesse King: Any normal man would have been dead after a brutal shot like that, but Vokoun is still alive.

Jazzman is stunned that Vokoun was able to kickout from that. Vokoun looks a little loopy. Jazzman then picks up Vokoun and sets him up for the Takin The A Train. Jazzman runs, but Vokoun moves out of the way. Both men are down.

Tim Hoss: Jesse, this match has just been grueling. Who ever wins this match, will deserve it. Both men have proven that they are great performers.

Jesse King: I think the winner of this match will win the whole thing Gorilla.


Jazzman gets to his feet first, he sees Vokoun trying to get to his knees. Jazzman is setting him up for another Yakzua Kick. He's about to shoot into the ropes, but Xavian Gunn holds Jazzman's feet. As Jazzman is distracted, Vokoun shoots up like a man with his 18th wind and applies the Mandible Claw on Jazzman.

Vokoun doesn't have it on good though, as the affects from the earlier damage to Vokoun's arm has taken effect. Jazzman gets to the ropes.

Smokin Vokoun signals for the end and he picks up Jazzman and throws him to the turnbuckle. He goes up the top rope and is about to carry Jazzman up with him. But then TITANOTHERE shows up.

Tim Hoss: Jesse, it's TITANOTHERE...LISTEN TO THIS CROWD, THEY ARE STANDING!!!

Jesse King: What the hell is he doing out here!? He shouldn't be out here!!

Vokoun then drops Jazzman and starts jawing with Titan. He is distracted as Jazzman gains new strength and hits Smokin Vokoun with a Yakzua Kick to the back of the head. Vokoun falls out of the ring. But instead of trying to get back into the ring, he starts brawling with Titanother. Ref Jon Creed starts the count.
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3
4

Tim Hoss: These two bulls are going at it back and forth...the count is still going on. If Vokoun doesn't get back in, he's gone.

Jesse King: Xavian has got to get control of him. Vokoun has just plain lost it...again.

Vokoun and Titan are brawling on the floor, while Jazzman is collapsed on the turnbuckle.

5
6
7

Vokoun and Titan are still brawling. Xavian Gunn tries to get Smokin Vokoun back into the ring, but Vokoun just shoves Gunn down and he starts brawling again with Titan.

8
9
10!!!!

DING DING DING

Vokoun hears the bell and glares into the ring, seeing an exhausted yet smiling Jazzman. Titanothere is laughing at this as well.

Michael Muffer: The winner of this match...as a result of a COUNTOUT....JAZZMAN!!!!

Tim Hoss: That was an incredible turn of events. Jazzman has won this match on count out.

Jesse King: I can't believe that Smokin Vokoun cared more about beating up Titanothere than winning this match of the tournament. Something tells me his thought process isn't right.

Tim Hoss: Gee Jess, what makes you think that??

Vokoun starts going insane and runs into the ring to argue with John Creed. Vokoun starts pounding on the ref and picks up Creed for a Samoan Drop. Jazzman comes in to help but Vokoun goes nuts on him too. He then applies the Mandible Claw on Jazzman and won't let go. Vokoun is screaming like a lunatic and Titanothere runs into the ring to save Jazzman. Titan pulls Smokin Vokoun off Jazzman and the two stare down. Xavian Gunn gets in between the two men and begs Vokoun to leave the ring, which Smokin Vokoun does. Vokoun leaves the ring but still glares at Titanothere.


Titanothere then picks up Jazzman. Jazzman at first doesn't know what to do. Titanothere just looks at him, smiles and raises Jazzman's hands in victory. Jazzman shakes Titans hand before Titan leaves the ring. The crowd gives Jazzman a standing ovation. But he doesn't know how to take it.

Tim Hoss: That's something that I love to see Jess. Jazzman deserved that win and know he will go one to the Finals of the Tournament at Saved By The Bell.

Jesse King: Yeah, but Jazzman should be lucky that Titanothere showed up. If it wasn't for him, Smokin Vokoun would have won it, no doubt!

Hoss - Well, later tonight, The Southwest Connection and a mystery partner will face Heavy Metal Hollywood in 6-man tag team action.

King - All week, people have speculated who the partner could be. Viva does have his fair share of enemies around here, Gorilla.

Hoss - Remember, over a year ago, Viva became the first Heatz!!1 Champion by defeating Brahma Bull in a tournament final.

King - Are you saying you think Brahma Bull could be the partner?

Hoss - It’s possible, Jess.

King - But Brahma Bull hasn’t worked here in months!

Hoss - It’s just speculation Jess. Nothing else.


*Heavy Metal Hollywood is wandering around backstage. They're all loitering in a corner, when they start hearing some sweet bass guitar licks.*

Viva Los Bio Dome: Dave, do you hear that?

*D-Day Dave nods.*

Viva Los Bio Dome: We gotta go find out who's ripping on that guitar. Guys, spread out. Return with that bassplayer!

*Heavy Metal Hollywood disperses. Headbanger Man and D-Day Dave go down the hall, Koda begins checking the doors, and Viva listens around to figure out where the sound is coming from.*

*Headbanger Man opens a door down the hall and finds Jonathan Michaels and Sara Nakatomi making out.*

Headbanger Man: Getting prepared for Nakatomi Plaza, I see! *laughs*

Jonathan Michaels: Get the hell out of here, perv.

Headbanger Man: Hold on, man. Do you know who's playing that bass guitar? Can you even hear that.

Jonathan Michaels: Yeah, he's been playing it all day. You should check the other locker room. Okay, now seriously, get the hell out of here.

Headbanger Man: You got it.

*Headbanger Man closes the door but holds the handle. He then pops it open a crack and continues to watch Jonathan and Sara. Jonathan notices some snickering and giggling, pauses, walks over the the door and slams it in Headbanger's face. It hits him in the forehead.*

Headbanger Man: OW!

*Down the hall, Koda opens a door to find Square popping open a briefcase full of money, and asking Amigo to help him start counting.*

Amigo: Honestly, I don't really feel like counting it. Do it yourself, man.

Square: If you want a cut, you'll start counting.

Amigo: Sigh... okay.

*Koda closes the door. D-Day Dave quickly opens a door, without realizing that it was Seth Drakin's office.*

Seth Drakin: You aren't scheduled to see me. What the hell are you doing here? Can I help you?

D-Day Dave: Yeah man. You hear that bass playing? Who the hell is that, and where can I find him?

Seth Drakin: I don't have time for this. I have a successful business to operate. Something you know nothing about. Move along, Dave.

D-Day Dave: No help!

*D-Day Dave closes the door. *

Headbanger Man: Over here, guys! I found him!

*The rest of Heavy Metal Hollywood run over to Headbanger's location and look into the door in awe. Inside, they find a sick set up of amps and pedals, and Sparks is inside shredding on his bass guitar.*

Viva Los Bio Dome: How the hell did you learn to play like that, Sparks?

Sparks: I've been playing bass since I was a little kid, man. I've always loved it.

D-Day Dave: Where the hell were you during tryouts, man?! We could use a bass player like you.

Sparks: I don't know, man. I was focused on other things.

Viva Los Bio Dome: Would you be interested in being the bass player for Heavy Metal Hollywood?

*Koda clears his throat rather loudly. Viva smacks him in the chest.*

Sparks: Yeah, man. That'd be pretty sweet I guess. Just one thing, though. You know I'm in pretty heavy with Amigo, right?

Viva Los Bio Dome: Yeah. You guys have been fighting for months now.

Sparks: Yeah. Well, if you guys help me out with that, I'll join your band.

D-Day Dave: Sounds good to me. It's not really fair to Koda, though. He's our current player. So, let's just set up a match for later tonight. If you beat Koda, you'll take his place, and he'll be demoted to our roadie. If you lose, you'll be our roadie.

Sparks: Uh, no. I'm not going to be a roadie. Sorry.

D-Day Dave: Don't lose, then. Think of this as the tryout you never had.

Sparks: Alright, deal, then. I'll prove myself to you.

*The camera pans out as everybody in the band is giving Sparks a high five.*


Tournament of Honor Semifinal Match: Jonathan Michaels V. “Champagne” Jay Carroll

Michael Muffler: The following match is a semi-final match of the Championship of Honor tournament, scheduled for one fall.

-Silversun Pickups: Panic Switch-

*Jay Carroll steps from behind the curtain, accompanied by 4 women, 2 of which are holding champagne bottles.*

MM: Approaching the ring first, accompanied by his lovely assistants, hailing from Philadelphia, PA, weighing in at 215 pounds... ."Champagne" Jay Carroll!

*Jay walks down the ramp as the audience divides pretty evenly between boos and cheers. He walks down to the ringsteps, walks up the ring apron, and leans against the ring ropes as two of his assistants spray champagne into the air. He then steps into the ring and stretches out across the top rope to wait for Jonathan Michaels.*

-Foo Fighters: DOA-

MM: Now approaching the ring, accompanied by Sara Nakatomi, hailing from Los Angeles, CA, weighing 240 pounds.... Jonathan Michaels!


*Jonathan Michaels and Sara Nakatomi step out from behind the smoke and walk down the ramp to an arena cheering very loudly for JoMo. Sara makes a face and mouths the word "Skanks" as she passes by Jay Carroll's assistants, and Michaels rolls into the ring and takes his corner.*

Gorilla Tim Hoss: These two men have found themselves on the same side lately, but tonight is a battle of stuntman versus rich man. Who do you have winning, King?

Jesse King: Who cares? Jazzman will wipe the floor with the winner regardless.

*The referee signals for the two men to approach the middle of the ring. Jay and JoMo approach each other uneasily, Jay slicking his hair back and offering a handshake. Michaels looks around, and finally accepts the handshake, and both men back away.*

TH: Looks like Carroll actually has a little bit of respect for Michaels.

*The referee calls for the bell and the two men go into a collar-and-elbow tieup in the middle of the ring. Michaels backs Carroll into his corner, and the ref calls for a break. Jonathan gives a clean break and backs away. Carroll pushes his hair back and begins circling the ring, and Michaels goes into a circle, too. The men lock up again, and Carroll pulls Michaels into an armdrag, locking the arm. Michaels gets back to his feet quickly, and slings Jay into the ropes for an Irish Whip. Carroll bounces off the ropes and Michaels drops down, Carroll skipping over him. Carroll bounces off the far ropes and runs straight into Michaels, neither man budging. Both men make a beeline for the ropes, Michaels landing a clothesline and getting the better of the exchagne, then follows up with a flurry of punches. Carroll excapes by standing between the ropes, making the referee back Michaels up.*

JK: Neither man has really gotten out of the starting blocks yet, Gorilla. Why are they taking so long?

TH: Just an early feeling out process, King. Relax.

*As the ref backs Michaels up, Carroll prepares for a springboard back into the ring and lands a flying forearm. Michaels gets back to his feet quickly and just as quickly is swept back off his feet by a low kick from Carroll. Carroll positions Michaels in the middle of the ring, and delivers two stiff kicks to the lower back, followed by a dropkick to the neck. Michaels rolls to the outside, with Carroll in hot pursuit. Carroll stands on the ring apron and waits for Michaels to stand, then hits a running senton to crash both men to the floor.*

TH: Jay Carroll has taken control of the match, but will he be able to finish? We'll find out next.

*Back from commercial, we see Jay Carroll locking in a chinlock and Jonathan Michaels struggling to break free.*

TH: During the commercial break, we saw Jay take complete control of this match, didn't we King?

JK: He sure did Gorilla. The only offense from the Michaels camp came from Sara's right hand.

*A replay of the action during the break plays. Jay Carroll reversed an Irish Whip and sent JoMo crashing into the ring steps, then posed in front of Sara. Sara slapped him silly, and Carroll stumbled away. After regrouping, Carroll tossed Michaels into the ring and slid in behind him, locking in the chinlock. We return to live action, and Michaels is fighting to his feet, finally pulling free and hitting a snap suplex. Jay scrambles to his feet only to be snap suplexed again, and a third time for good measure. Michaels locks in an armbar, but Carroll makes it to the ropes for the break. The referee asks for and gets his break, and Jay tries to take advantage with a quick forearm shot but misses. Michaels slings Carroll into the ropes and sets up for a spinebuster, but Jay holds on and ducks out of the ring. Michaels gives chase and Carroll rolls back in, catching JoMo and dropping an elbow on him as he rolls back in. Carroll picks up Michaels for a delayed vertical suplex and drops him into the mat hard, then springs up for a Lionsault. Michaels moves and Jay lands on his feet, then runs into a sidewalk slam.*

JK: Michaels with the lateral press!

1....
2...

*Jay kicks out and fights back to his feet. Jay misses a wild punch and walks into a belly to belly suplex that bounces him off the mat and into a corner. Michaels runs in and lands a clothesline, then stretches Jay out for the pin*

1....
2....

*Jay rolls the shoulder and struggles to pull himself up in a corner. Michaels posts himself in a corner, readying himself for a spear. When Jay finally pulls himself up, he ducks between the ropes, and the crowd begins to boo loudly after anticipating the end. Jay steps back in and ducks the clothesline, attempting a quick rollup*

1...
2....

*Michaels powers out and hits a spear after taking two steps. Both men crash to the mat hard, and Michaels goes for the pin.*

1...
2....

*Jay Carroll grabs the ropes and gets the ref to break the count. Michaels looks a little frustrated, and Carroll looks relieved. Michaels attempts another clothesline and misses, and is dropkicked in the back, sending him into the turnbuckle. As he bounces off, Jay takes two quick steps, hits the ropes, and lands a lariat that smashes Michaels down. Both men lay in the middle of the ring and the ref begins counting. Sara Nakatomi begins pounding on the mat, and both men make it back up after a count of 6. JoMo gets the better of a fist exchange, and Jay pulls Michaels down with a drop toe hold. Jay springs back up, hits the ropes and dropkicks Michaels in the face, then runs and lands a Lionsault.*

TH: Carroll may have it here!

1....
2....

*Michaels rolls the shoulder and Carroll looks frustrated. Carroll lays in the stomps and kicks, but Michaels grabs his foot and pulls him into The Key Grip. Carroll fights until he frees his foot and rolls into the turnbuckle, with Michaels in hot pursuit. Carroll sidesteps Michaels, spins him around, and lands The Last Call.*

1....
2...

*Michaels weakly gets out of the pin as the crowd gets on their feet. Carroll pulls his own hair and pulls Michaels back up, attempting another lariat. Michaels ducks and smacks Jay with a Fade to Black, and both men hit the canvas. The referee begins counting again until he reaches 8 with both men pulling themselves up with a lot of effort. Carroll lands a flying forearm and stumbles into the turnbuckle, pulling himself up and waiting for JoMo to stand. Michaels gets to his feet and Carroll flies through the air with a cross body... Michaels uses his momentum to reverse it into a pin!*

1....
2....

*Carroll fights from under Michaels and the crowd catches its breath. Carroll rolls to the ring apron and Michaels follows, Carroll with the forearm shot. Carroll slingshots back in, attempting a sunset flip but Michaels grabs a nearby rope to prevent the momentum from taking him. Carroll slides away, Michaels runs over to him... Carroll pulls JoMo into a small package! Both men have their shoulders down!*

1....
2....
3!

*The referee calls for the bell and both men roll onto their knees. Carroll has a huge smile on his face and is already raising his arm, Michaels stares at him, also smiling. The referee runs past Jay and raises Jonathan's arm!

JK: Wait, no, that can't be right! Both men had their shoulders pinned!
TH: I'm not sure who won to be honest, King.

*The referee walks over to the timeskeeper and Michael Muffler, saying something that is inaudible to the cameras. Michael Muffler then raises his microphone.*

MM: Ladies and gentlemen, the referee is asking that the last 5 seconds of the match be replayed from the ringside cameramen's point of view.

*The footage of Carroll pulling JoMo into the small package is shown from a low-to-the-canvas point of view. From here, you can see both men's shoulders down until the count of two, where Michaels gets one shoulder off the mat and both of Carroll's shoulders are still down.*

TH: The referee was correct in his decision. Michaels is the winner!

MM: Your winner of the match, Jonathan Michaels!

*Michaels face breaks out into a bigger smile and Carroll stares into space in disbelief. JoMo and Sara Nakatomi walk up the ramp and away from ringside, JoMo's arm still raised. Carroll rolls over and grabs a microphone.*

JC: Hey, Michaels!

*Michaels and Nakatomi turn around. The crowd holds their breath, waiting for Carroll to curse Michaels.*

You better win next week.

JM: Oh, I will!

*The arena breaks out in cheers for JoMo as he walks up the ramp. Carroll finally leaves the ringside area, ignoring the fans who want high fives until he stands at the top, flipping them off. The crowd turns on him in an instant.*

Hoss - And the finals are set! At Saved by the Bell, it will be Jazzman V. Jonathan Michaels for the Championship of Honor!

King - We’ll be right back.


Sparks V. Koda

*Pull Me Under*

Sparks is out to a warm ovation from the crowd. He walks his way to the ring and sets up for his match.

*Saints of Los Angeles*

Heavy Metal Hollywood all make their way to the ring, almost in a haste like manner, as if they want to hurry up and get this over with.

Both D-Day Dave and Viva motion for the ref to get the match started.

"Spud" Verne Johnson quickly checks the men for weapons and calls for the bell.

Both men quickly lock up, with Sparks quickly getting the upper hand. Sparks whips Koda to the ropes, and both Dave and Viva grab Koda's legs. Koda hits the mat, quickly gets up, turns around, and shrugs at his stablemates. Viva and D-Day Dave shrug back, and
Koda turns right around into the Coup de Grace.

Sparks quickly goes for the pin.

1...
2...
3..!

Michael Muffer - Your winner, and brand new member of Heavy Metal Hollywood, Sparks!

*The rest of the guys storm the ring and welcome Sparks to the team. Viva motions the announcer to toss him a microphone*

Viva Los Bio Dome: Koda, I just want you to know something. We all love you, man. Every single person in Heavy Metal Hollywood looks at you like a brother. It doesn't change the facts though. The fact is, since feuding with me for the now retired Heatz!!1 title over 8 months ago, you haven't done a god damn thing to pull your weight in this company. I mean, your track record speaks for itself, and I can't recall a big win coming your way in a long damn time.

Me and the guys think it's time to hold you and your lazy ass accountable. You think everything is just going to come easy for you because you've aligned yourself with some winners. Well, I'm here to tell you that it's just not going to be that way. You see, Sparks is a lot like me. The guy has a friggin' buttload of talent just oozing out of that well chisled physique. The guy is just begging for an opportunity to prove himself. Unfortunately for him, Seth Drakin is a horrible CEO that is so nearsighted that he lets fantastic opportunities to push new talent go right by him, and they're forced to make their own opportunites.

Well, Heavy Metal Hollywood would rather help someone who has been trying, and wants the help. You think you deserve the help. Despite collapsing under the weight you should be carrying, you honestly feel like you're of use to us right now. Well, you weren't. But you are now. Maybe if you spend some time as our roadie, you will finally see the potential you're letting to go to waste. Now get up, and shake Sparks hands. There will be no hard feelings in this band of brothers.

*Koda gets up, shakes off the effects of the finisher, and begrudgingly offers his hand out to Sparks. Sparks takes it, and Heavy Metal Hollywood slowly leaves the ring and heads up the ramp.*

Hoss - Well, Heavy Metal Hollywood has a new bass player, Jess!

King - Yes, and you have to wonder how the ex-bass player, Koda, feels about that. I mean, they practically kicked him out!

Hoss - Y’think he’d be mad enough to look for payback, Jess?

King - Wait a minute. You don’t think Koda could be the mystery man, do you?

Hoss - Well, maybe.

King - Somehow, I just don’t see it, Gorilla.

Hoss - I’m just making a guess, Jesse. Chill man!


Inspector Shetty V. Mr. Quintana Roo

Michael Muffer - The following contest is set for one fall, with a fifteen minute time limit.

*Vogue*
Mr. Quintana Roo and Leon Sharpe make their way to the ring, with Sharpe occasionally photographing Roo along the way.

Michael Muffer - Introducing first, accompanied by his manager Leon Sharpe, from “Your Wildest Dreams”, weighing in at 215 pounds, Mr. Quintana Roo!

*Wannabe in LA*
Inspector Shetty makes his way through the curtain to a chorus of boos. Shetty, seemingly not in the mood, just cues up the “SHETTY!!!” chants and continues on his way to the ring.

Michael Muffer - And his opponent, from Bombay, England, weighing in at 265 pounds, Inspector Shetty!

Hoss - This should be a very interesting contest, Jess. Quintana Roo has been on a roll as of late, climbing his way up the WWCF Rankings via wins over Warrior 2099 and Ryan Starshine.

King - Then you have Shetty, who’s been fairly quiet since losing to The General of the Monkey Army at Ernest Goes to Wargames.

Hoss - And speaking of the General, last night, Roo tried to get the upper hand on the General after his match with TTS, but thanks to the General’s friend Bongo, Roo and Sharpe were both sent packing.

King - Well, there’s the bell Gorilla. Time to get this thing rollin’!

Roo and Shetty tie up. Shetty armdrag’s Roo, but the masked man rolls with it and monkey flip’s Shetty to the mat! Both men back up, Shetty charges, Roo with a dropkick, but Shetty steps back! Roo crashes to the mat! Shetty pulls Roo up and sets him up for a suplex, but Roo fights out of it and hit’s a bulldog on Shetty! Cover!

1!
Kickout!

Roo goes to the ropes and tries a springboard moonsault, but Shetty moves! Roo lands on his feet and charges Shetty, who catches him with a scoop slam! Cover!

1!
Kickout!

Shetty pulls Roo up and whips him into the ropes. Roo runs back, right into a belly-to-belly suplex! Shetty then sit’s Roo up and applies a rear chinlock!

Hoss - Roo in trouble here, Jess!

King - No kidding, Gorilla! Shetty’s got that hold cinched in good!

Shetty clamps down on Roo’s neck, adding more pressure. Sharpe frantically slaps the ring apron, trying to rally his man. Roo slowly begins to fight, trying to shake off the Inspector. He manages to get to a standing position, with Shetty holding him in more of a side headlock. Roo pushes Shetty off into the ropes, ducks a rebounding clothesline, and nails Shetty with a dropkick! Cover!

1!
Kickout!

Roo sit’s Shetty up, then hit’s a dropkick to the face! He then pulls Shetty near the ropes and ascends to the top. He stops and poses for a picture when…

*King Kong 2004*

King - Now hang on! He’s gonna come out here now?!

Roo and Sharpe look around nervously, but after a few more seconds, nobody has come out. Roo breathes a sigh of relief and goes for the Photo Opportunity, but Shetty rolls out of the way! Roo crashes and burns! Shetty get’s to his feet and yanks Roo to his feet for…

THE CAL-CUTTER!!!

Cover!

1!
2!
3!

Michael Muffer - Here is your winner, Inspector Shetty!

Shetty rolls to the outside as Roo grabs a mic and angrily screams in Spanish. Sharpe quickly takes the mic from him.

Sharpe - General, consider your challenge accepted!

Hoss - Wow, another match added to Saved by the Bell, Jess!

King - This show is shaping up to be quite an event, Gorilla!

Hoss - Speaking of events, we still have our big main event, Heavy Metal Hollywood V. The Southwest Connection and a mystery partner.

King - We’ve speculated all night about who it might be. One name that hasn’t been mentioned yet is Little Naitch’s good friend King Motor-Colt.

Hoss - Interesting possibility. Colt was the 2009 King of WrestleCrap and he never had the chance to defend his crown this year.

King - Not only that, but Viva was very critical of him after he left the company late last year. Perhaps Colt might want to make an impact return?

Hoss - We’ll just have to wait and see, Jess.


Girlfriend - Avril Lavigne

MM - Ladies and Gentlemen, please welcome Sara Nakatomi.

Sara enters the ring where her set has been built, a fluffy pink Lovesac and two purple beanbags sit atop a teal carpet.

Thank you, everyone, and welcome to Nakatomi Plaza!

So, like, this is the segment where I ask the tough questions of today's top WWCF stars.

My very first guests, they call themselves the Human Hate Machines, Square and Amigo!

*Welcome To Hell*

Square and Amigo make their way to the plaza, sneering at the crowd, they take their seats in the purple beanbags, somewhat uncomfortably.

So welcome, you two, I have some questions, this first one is for Square, what I want to know is, Are there any other shapes you like?

The first question you ask, "do you like other shapes?" Ladies and gentlemen, proof that there are in fact Asian bimbos. The Revolution of Evolution does not mind other shapes, they all have there part to play. Like how the "Truth" Commission have a part to play in the Human Hate Machines' walk to the tag titles

Speaking of parts, You and Amigo will be chained with dog collars to Evil M and YellowJacket in your match, so I have to ask, how long have you and Amigo been into that sort of thing?

Since you are the girlfriend of a hack who only got into wrestling because he wasn't a good stuntman, I should not express suprise you do not know of a classic match type. Besides, Yellowjacket suggested it anyways.

Unlike your "partner", no member of the Human Hate Machines are sexually interested in the same sex. However, both of us do have experiance in the dog collar match, with The Murderer of Dreams competing in the most famous tag match in WWCF history in a dog collar match.


Murderer Of Dreams? ooh, scary.

Now my next question is for both of you, I'll let Square answer first, Between your two opponents, which one do you think is the weak link, M or YellowJacket?

M, because he's chained up with God's Greatest Gift.

Amigo, Same question.

Both of them suck equally.[/

So, Square, what are your feelings about the job Seth Drakin has done as CEO thus far?

It's hard to say really, because on a personal level the man has done nothing to annoy the Human Sun, infact he granted the Human Hate Machines a future tag title shot. However on a professional level there have been decisions from his office which have received negativity from The Real Non American Hero due to differing stances on important issues.

Such as?

See this foot, it's for kicking people's asses not for putting it in dog doo. The correct people know Her Majesty's Greatest Export's opinions and thats all who matters.

Okay, I have a couple more questions for you two, and I'll ask them after this brief word from my sponsor.

Jonathan Michaels is backstage holding a box of Cocoa Krispies.

Buy Cocoa Krispies or you suck.

Fade out.

And we're back with the Human Hate Machines, Square, our WWCF Champion Viva Los Bio Dome seems to have made a lot of enemies recently, how do you feel about him?

If you ever watch the show, it's made perfectly clear that Viva is nothing more than a scumbag thief who threw me under the bus to get where he is today. There can be a lot said about this, but lets just say it will all come out soon.


As a matter of fact, I do watch the show all the time, I just flip channels during the boring parts.

Like your matches.

Anyway, one final question, Square, do you have a message for your opponents?

Firstly, don't tune out of the Revolution of Evolutions matches, because there the true highlight of the show. And also, there may be rumours of a certain darkness falling over WWCF soon.

Lads, you've signed your own death warrants. You're going toe to toe with the two most dangerous men in this company, in a match where you have no advantages. You're screwed, simple as that.

If you two want to mow my lawn after I retire you, I am willing.

Well, guys, thank you for coming . . .

Jonathan is standing on the ramp, pointing at his watch.

But we're out of time.

And, Cut.

Jonathan gives her an exasperated look as Sara makes her way up the ramp.

Hoss - Strong words from the Human Hate Machines, but can they back those words up at Saved by the Bell?

King - The ones who need to be worried are the Truth Coalition, Gorilla. Amigo and Square know what they’re getting into, but as evidenced by recent banter on wwcf.com, Yellow Jacket and Evil M may not.

Hoss - Well, speaking of wwcf.com, all week, speculation has gone on concerning The Southwest Connection’s partner tonight.

King - One name that came up a lot was that of Viva’s former partner, Stryker.

Hoss - A very good possibility. Stryker would probably love a chance to get revenge on the World Champion for the way their partnership ended.

King - So many possibilities, but it could be anyone, Gorilla!

Hoss - I can’t wait until our main event to find out who it is!


Truth Coalition V. “Damn Right“ Jackson and The Boiler room Brawler

Gorilla Tim Hoss: This next match is a disaster waiting to happen, King.

Jesse King: I agree, TH. Jackson and BRB? Forced to team up?

Gorilla Tim Hoss: The irony of this is that all of it started precisely because BRB wanted DR Jackson to join Corporate.

Jesse King: But Jackson, in his arrogance, had to put BRB to the "test," got lucky, and chalked it up as a true victory.

"Men on the Thunderstruck Mountain" hits the speakers. The crowd boos.

Michael Muffer: Now entering the ring, weighing at a combined weight of 544lbs... Evil M and Yellowjacket: The Truth... Coalition!

Gorilla Tim Hoss: But now they must face the teamup of Evil M and Yellowjacket, and BRB may want Jackson's help for this one.

The Truth Coalition heads towards the ring.

Jesse King: You're telling me. They both have it out for BRB's Hardcore Championship.

Gorilla Tim Hoss: And since they each lost their title shots last week-

Jesse King: And their rankings for the DR Jackson's Inter-Forum Championship.

Gorilla Tim Hoss: And all of that following a beatdown at the hands of the newcomer The Hangman.

Jesse King: They just might be pissed.

Michael Muffer: And their opponent...

"You Asked For It" by Mercyful Fate hits the speakers to cheers.

Michael Muffer: Hailing from Rockford, IL and weighing in at 340lbs...

Gorilla Tim Hoss: But will they be pissed off enough to boil their own blood?

BRB emerges and walks down the ramp with his pipe wrench in hand.

Michael Muffer: Your WWCF Hardcore Champion: Boiler... Room... Brawler!

Jesse King: Boiler Room Brawler sure knows a thing or two about boiling; it's right in his name!

Gorilla Tim Hoss: You got that right, King. He seems to be boiling some of his weight away too.

BRB enters the ring and glares at the Truth Coalition, ready to swing his pipe wrench at them.

Gorilla Tim Hoss: The Boiler Room Brawler is a dangerous individual and he proved it last week when he managed to maneuver his way into a victory-

Footage of BRB reversing Evil M's powerbomb into his Boiler Room Bomb for a pin shows on the Craptron.

Gorilla Tim Hoss: When he used his Boiler Room Bomb to defeat Evil M.

Jesse King: I don't know where he got that from, but he seems to have been training up with someone.

Michael Muffer: And his partner...

The crowd already begins booing as "Bring Tha Noise" by Anthrax featuring Chuck D hits the speakers to a shower of boos.

Jesse King: Here we go...

Michael Muffer: Hailing from West Philly, PA...

Gorilla Tim Hoss: Born and raised I hear.

DR Jackson walks down the ramp with a stern look on his face, staring straight ahead as BRB and The Truth Coalition respectfully stare him down.

Michael Muffer: Weighing in at 296lbs. Your Inter-Forum Champion...

The crowd boos even more.

Michael Muffer: D... R... Jackson!

DR Jackson cautiously enters the ring as BRB gets into the corner and the Truth Coalition does so as well.

Jesse King: This is a pressure cooker, TH. I predict a win for the Truth Coalition.

Gorilla Tim Hoss: You may be on to something there, King, but The Truth Coalition have hardly proven themselves as a tag team so far.

Jesse King: What makes you say that?

Gorilla Tim Hoss: They've been beaten down by the Hangman, they've individually lost to their opponents, and they don't have the belt.

Jesse King: But they see eye to eye and don't want to bash each other's brains in.

Gorilla Tim Hoss: Well let's turn our attention to the match.

Evil M and DR Jackson stand at their corners while BRB and Yellowjacket pace about in the ring. Referee Lloyd McFloyd starts the match.

Jesse King: This doesn't look good for Yellowjacket - he's easily too small to affect BRB.

Yellowjacket runs up to BRB, leaps into the air, and puts in a headlock around the back of BRB's head. BRB latches his arms around Yellowjacket for a bear hug.

Gorilla Tim Hoss: Well these men are wasting no time tonight, King.

Jesse King: Well Yellowjacket sure is wasting his time.

BRB runs straight forward into the turnbuckle ahead, crushing Yellowjacket's back, making him release the hold and slump down.

Gorilla Tim Hoss: BRB using his size to his advantage as usual.

BRB throws a couple of punches at Yellowjacket, making him fall down into a sitting position. BRB backs up and then charges, driving his knee into Yellowjacket's face.

Jesse King: BRB is going to cream Yellowjacket. A beating from the Hangman and from DR Jackson tends to tenderize ya.

BRB grabs Yellowjacket by the leg and drags him to the center of the ring. He drops down and locks in the leg. Referee Lloyd McFloyd makes the count as Evil M crosses the ropes. 1... Evil M knocks BRB off of Yellowjacket and lifts him up at his side and slams him back down.

Gorilla Tim Hoss: Evil M with a sidewalk slam to BRB.

Jesse King: Now Evil M, he's big enough to actually take on BRB. Hell, he has a solid half foot on him!

Evil M drags Yellowjacket to their corner as Referee Lloyd McFloyd gives him the count to return. He crosses the ropes and Yellowjacket reaches up to tag him in.

Gorilla Tim Hoss: Clever move by Evil M, who's ready for revenge from last week.

Evil M stomps on BRB as he tries to get up. He locks his arm around the back of his head, lifts up BRB, and then drops down, driving BRB's head into the mat.

Gorilla Tim Hoss: A DDT from Evil M to BRB! That's got to hurt.

Jesse King: But this is our Hardcore Champion, TH! We know for a fact that this is small pickings for him!

Evil M goes for the pin. Referee Lloyd McFloyd counts 1... BRB kicks out.

Jesse King: Damn BRB's tough!

Both men return to their feet and lock arms. BRB wins out and irish whips Evil M to his corner. He walks up and sticks out his hand to tag Jackson in.

Jesse King: Oh, BRB you don't need him...

Gorilla Tim Hoss: Will DR Jackson tag in?

Jackson jumps down to the arena floor.

Jesse King: I knew it! Jackson is willing to take this rivalry all of the way! Not even to win a tag match with BRB!

Evil M barrels into BRB, knocking him over. He drives his knee into BRB's head as BRB tries to return to his feet.

Jesse King: Where was this Evil M last week?

Gorilla Tim Hoss: Not as angry, full of hope, outmaneuvered...

Evil M backs up to a corner, then runs and drops his elbow into BRB's chest.

Gorilla Tim Hoss: A crushing elbow drop from Evil M!

DR Jackson bends over while on the arena floor.

Jesse King: What's Jackson doing?

Evil M climbs the top rope as BRB recovers.

Gorilla Tim Hoss: Oh boy, Evil M looks like he's going to try something big on BRB.

Jesse King: You pretty much have to.

DR Jackson jumps back up onto the apron, right behind Evil M. He's holding BRB's pipe wrench and he winds up.

Jesse King: Oh no, here we go!

Jackson swings it into Evil M's back, making him fall onto BRB.

Gorilla Tim Hoss: Evil M got his splash, but Jackson just cost them the match!

Referee Lloyd McFloyd ends the match as Jackson crosses the ropes.

Michael Muffer: Here are your winners as the result of a disqualification: The Truth Coalition!

"Men on the Thunderstruck Mountain" hits the speakers as Jackson rolls Evil M off of BRB.

Gorilla Tim Hoss: What's he doing?

Jesse King: Jackson, you can't!

Jackson brings down the hammer as the arena explodes with booing and screaming fans.

Gorilla Tim Hoss: No!

Jesse King: Jackson! That's it!

Jesse King removes his mic as Jackson smiles at the crowd. Jesse King slides into the ring and yells at Jackson.

Gorilla Tim Hoss: Jesse you've got to stop this! Now is not the time!

Jesse is in Jackson's face as Jackson's smile turns into a scowl.

Gorilla Tim Hoss: No, no...

Jackson swings at Jesse King, but Jesse ducks and spears Jackson to the ground.

Gorilla Tim Hoss: Jesse stop!

Jackson grapples with Jesse and manages to lift him up onto his shoulders.

Gorilla Tim Hoss: No!

Jackson uses the Anxiety Adjustment on Jesse and drops him to the mat just as BRB gets to his feet and grabs his pipe wrench.

Referees and EMT's come running out as BRB keeps Jackson at bay, his face covered in blood.

Gorilla Tim Hoss: Jackson has reached a new low! But BRB is back up!

Jackson goes back to smiling, puts on his shades, and slides out of the ring as 'Bring Tha Noise" by Anthrax featuring Chuck D hits the speakers.

Gorilla Tim Hoss: Disgusting... Jesse was way over his head! And BRB and Jackson are going to kill each other at Saved by the Bell. There will be blood.

King - Well, it’s almost time for our main event, but first, one more guess as to the mystery partner. He’s a former World Champion, Gorilla.

Hoss - If you mean who I think you mean, he also has a score to settle with Viva.

King - Yep. Could it be…

*Both speak at the same time*

King - Aaron Enigma?!

Hoss - Seth Drakin?!

Gorilla and Jesse look at each other for a moment, as neither had thought of the other’s guess.

King - …Let’s take it to the ring.


The Southwest Connection and a Mystery Partner V. Heavy Metal Hollywood

*The New Blackjacks Theme hits the speakers, and out comes The Southwest Connection. They grab a mic, and introduce their mystery partner.*

*Down on Me hits, and TTS makes his way to the ring, climbs up the steps, hops under a rope, and high fives his teammates. They look ready for war.*

*Saints Of Los Angeles by Motley Crue*

D-Day Dave and Headbanger Man come walking out first. D-Day Dave is holding a flying V guitar while pretending to play it and Headbanger Man has drum sticks and is air drumming. By their side is H.M.H. valets Marrissa Logan and Alexa Anderson. Right behind them is Sparks is holding a big axe shaped bass guitar. Koda follows with a ton of extra gear. They all wait at the bottom of the ramp, and wait patiently for Viva.

*Paparazzi by Lady Gaga*

A fancy throne is rolled out to the top of the ramp, and Paparazzi cameras are flashing as "The King Of Hollywood" Viva Los Bio Dome walks to the top of the ramp with H.M.H.valet Lisa Garcia by his side. Right behind him is H.M.H. security Vince Hetfield and Axl Roth. Viva grabs a microphone.

Viva Los Bio Dome: I hate to let you guys down, but me and the boys discussed it, and we think it's best that I wait to get in to the ring with Littlenaitch next week at Saved By The Bell. Since we issued our challenge as Heavy Metal Hollywood, Sparks is more than willing to take my place tonight. Good luck, and have fun. Oh, and 'Naitch, I'd think it's in your best interest to keep an eye on me up here. You never know what could happen if you drop your guard for just one second.

Tyfo and Littlenaitch are livid. They turn to the ref and ask if this is legal, and the ref shrugs and nods. Sparks, Dave, and Headbanger Man all look up at Viva, and smile. They seem hungry for the opportunity to bang up the number one contender, and take out some aggression on Tyfo, since he's been running his mouth. Sparks is anxious for the opportunity to prove himself as a legitimate addition to Heavy Metal Hollywood.

Before the ref can call for the bell, all 6 men are brawling in the ring. The ref doesn't even bother trying to restore order, figuring that order will restore itself after a couple of guys get the upper hand. Sparks dumps TTS to the outside, and Headbanger Man slides out to go after him. Tyfo and D-Day Dave are trading blows, and Littlenaitch drops Sparks with a clothesline. Naitch grabs the rope and begins stomping Sparks. Headbanger whips TTS into the guard railing outside. D-Day Dave hits Tyfo with a low blow and throws him out of the ring through the second rope. Dave turns around and walks into a kick in the midsection from Naitch.

The guys have all returned to their respective corners, so referee John Creed finally calls for the bell. D-Day Dave and Littlenaitch are the legal men.

Naitch scoops D-Day Dave up and holds him up high. He turns to Viva, mugs him, and then slams Dave down. He puts one foot on Dave and goes for a pinfall.

1...

2...

Dave kicks out and quickly charges his corner for a tag. Headbanger Man steps in and trades blows with Naitch. Headbanger gets the upper hand, whips Naitch into a corner, and charges him. Headbanger bounces off the ropes, and as Naitch stumbles back into the center of the ring, he eats a big boot. Headbanger looks up at Viva for approval, who is applauding. Headbanger goes for a quick cover.

1...

2...

Naitch kicks out. Headbanger picks Naitch up, and Naitch kicks him in the gut. Naitch stumbles backwards and catches a tag from Tyfo. Tyfo steps in and levels Headbanger with a huge clothesline. Tyfo spits towards Heavy Metal Hollywood's corner. Dave and Sparks take offense, and charge the ring. Naitch and TTS both follow. There's yet again another brawl in the ring. Sparks and Headbanger are focused in on Tyfo, and Dave is handling TTS. Naitch has his eyes locked on to Viva. Headbanger and Sparks dump Tyfo to the outside, and Sparks quickly rolls Naitch up for a pinfall.

The ref looks down and refuses to count, as Naitch is not the legal man. Headbanger is screaming at the ref. Naitch kicks out and angrily looks over at Headbanger. Tyfo slides back into the ring, and Naitch gets back into his corner, Naitch tags himself in and focuses in on Headbanger.

Heavy Metal Hollywood security Vince Hetfield and Axl Roth both make their way down to the ring. They step up onto the apron. They climb in under the ropes, and Dave and Sparks jump in and they begin brawling yet again. TTS and D-Day Dave both fall to the outside, brawling. Tyfo has his hands full with HMH Security and Headbanger Man. Viva charges the apron, slides into the ring, jumps up, and nails Littlenaitch with his Heavyweight Title.

John Creed calls for the bell and declares The Southwest Connection the winners.

Viva calls for a microphone as Heavy Metal Hollywood continue brawling with Tyfo and TTS, with TTS and Tyfo holding their own suprisingly well considering it's 5 on 2.

Viva Los Bio Dome: Hey, 'Naitch. Did that feel good? Well, I just wanted to say, good luck next week, buddy. You have a nice nap. *Laughs* Lets go, guys.

Heavy Metal Hollywood make their way up the ramp and continue backstage. They're highfiving and laughing all the way to the back.

Tyfo and TTS hop into the ring and help 'Naitch up. 'Naitch leans in to Tyfo and tells him these words.

Littlenaitch: If you throw that towel in next week, I swear to god I will kill you.

Tyfo nods and they zoom in on the angry face of Littlenaitch as Niteraw comes to a close.

Writing Credits: Smokin’ Vokoun, Viva Los Bio Dome, Jay Carroll, Evil M, Jonathan Michaels, Square, Amigo, and BRB