Sunday Night Heatz!!1 - March 21, 2010

Sunday Night Heatz!!1 - March 21, 2010

Sean Kelly - Welcome to WWCF Sunday Night Heatz!!1

Michael Gettenpill - We have a big show for you tonight! I’m Michael Gettenpill.

Sean Kelly - And I’m Sean Kelly. Tonight on Heatz!!1, we have The General of the Monkey Army battling the Voodoo Lawyer TTS.

Michael Gettenpill - After that, newcomer Griffin Ward takes on Cage King, who has been struggling with an identity crisis as of late.

Sean Kelly - After that, we have the Human Hate Machines taking on The Nightflys.

Michael Gettenpill - And in our main event, Titanothere battles the rookie, Kris Kobain!

Sean Kelly - Last week on Heatz!!1, Titanothere picked up a big win over Xavian Gunn, while on NiteRaw, Kobain lost a close one to Cage King.

Michael Gettenpill - Tonight, these two rising stars will battle it out in our featured match!


The General of the Monkey Army V. TTS

Jerry Fish - The following contest is set for one fall, with a 15 minute time limit.

*God’s Gonna Cut You Down*
TTS emerges through a cloud of smoke, carrying a chicken. As he walks to the ring, he cut’s the chicken’s head off and smears the blood on his chest.

Jerry Fish - Introducing first, from Davie, Florida, weighing in at 290 pounds, “The Voodoo Lawyer” TTS!

*King Kong 2004*
The General walks out, Tinkers perched on his shoulder, and Bongo the Gorilla by his side.

Jerry Fish - And his opponent, from Lansing, Michigan, weighing in at 225 pounds, The General of the Monkey Army!

Gettenpill - Well, this should certainly be an interesting contrast of styles here. The military strategies of the General against the voodoo mischief of TTS!

Kelly - There’s the bell and we are underway!

TTS and The General lock up. TTS goes for a wristlock, but The General reverses it and takes TTS down to the mat. A couple of stomps, then the General begins working over TTS’s leg.

Gettenpill - The General looking to soften TTS up for the Monkey Wrnech!

Kelly - Can’t blame him for wanting to end this one early. TTS can be a formidable opponent if given the opportunity!

The General stomps the leg, then drags TTS towards the ropes. He places the leg on the bottom rope, then stomps down on it!

Kelly - TTS is lucky if his leg isn’t broken when this match is done!

The General pulls TTS to the middle of the ring and attempts to apply the Monkey Wrench, but TTS catches him in a small package!

1!
2!
Kickout!

The General back up first and he catches TTS with a spinebuster! Cover!

1!
2!
Kickout!

The General pulls TTS up by the hair and whips him into the corner. He nails the Voodoo Lawyer with a running clothesline, then hit’s a big monkey flip out of the corner!

Kelly - The General on fire now, Michael!

Gettenpill - TTS may be in trouble!

TTS slowly gets to his feet as the General charges, TTS thinks fast and dives forward with a lariat, both men go down!

Kelly - Both men down, this could end in a countout, Michael!

Referee Spud Johnson begins his count.

“1!
2!
3!
4!
5!”

The General get’s to his knees, TTS starts pulling himself up using the ropes!

“6!
7!
8!”

The General is up first, with TTS right after him! The two meet in the middle of the ring and trade punches, with the crowd following right along, cheering both men!

Kelly - The fans not content to pick one favorite, Michael, they love both these guys!

TTS wins the exchange and backs the General into the ropes. He shoots the General off, but he charges back with a big shoulder tackle, knocking TTS to the outside! Tinkers runs over and sniffs at TTS, but the Voodoo Lawyer swats her away! Bongo angrily picks TTS and throws him back in the ring!

Gettenpill - TTS may have more than just a monkey on his back now, Sean!

The General picks TTS up on his shoulder and runs towards the turnbuckle, but TTS slides free, runs the General into the turnbuckle, then rolls him up!

1!
2!
Kickout!

The General back up, but TTS meets him with the Pileup! Cover!

1!
2!
3!

Jerry Fish - Here is your winner, TTS!

Johnson raises TTS’s hand as the former Heatz!!1 Champion makes his way to the back.

Gettenpill - Well, TTS builds up some momentum heading into next week’s Saved by the Bell PPV, where he and a partner of his choosing will challenge the Metal Express for the WWCF World Tag Team Championship.

Kelly - Yes, but you have to give the General credit for a strong show- LOOK OUT!!!

In the ring, Quintana Roo jumps the General from behind, hitting a backstabber on the Monkey Man! Bongo tries to intervene, but Leon Sharpe nails him from behind with his cane! Bongo yells in pain and turns angrily towards Sharpe. Sharpe tries to back away as Bongo advances towards him, but Sharpe points behind Bongo! Bongo turns to see Roo dives over the ropes at him! Bongo catches Roo and tosses him at Sharpe, as The General rolls to the floor and calls off his gorilla pal.

Gettenpill - Well, the issues between Roo and The General from a few weeks back are anything but resolved at this point, Sean.

Kelly - Definitely not, Michael. This situation is a melting pot that’s ready to explode!

Gettenpill - We’ll be right back, folks.


Cage King V. Griffin Ward

Jerry Fish - The following contest is scheduled for one fall with a 20 minute time limit!

(Through The Fire And Flames)
Jerry Fish - Introducing first, from Trenton, New Jersey, weighing 233 pounds..."The Houdini of Hardcore" GRIFFIN WARD!

(Freestyle rap)
Jerry Fish - And his opponent, from Los Angeles, California, weighing 295 pounds...CAGE KING!

- Cage freestyles down to the ring. As Ward removes his entrance attire, Cage throws the mic down and attacks him! He takes Ward to the mat and begins unloading with right hands, before kicking him out of the ring.

Sean Kelly: Cage King has developed something of an aggressive streak recently, and this is a great example of it.

Michael Gettenpill: This newcomer Griffin Ward was really ambushed there! Let's see if he can turn the tables.

- Cage goes to the outside and drives Ward into the barricade. He drops him face first onto the apron, before rolling him back into the ring as the referee admonishes him.

- Cage whips Ward into the ropes and hits a clothesline, followed by a Rolling Thunder. He goes for the cover.

1...
2...

- Ward kicks out. Cage scoops him up and slams him down to the canvas, before scaling the turnbuckles. He attempts a flying elbow, but Ward moves out of the way.

Kelly: Nobody home on that one. This could be Griffin Ward's chance to show us what he's made of here.

- Both men wearily get to their feet. Ward blocks a punch, and hits a series of his own. He hits a low dropkick onto Cage, and then follows it up with a roundhouse to the head!

1...
2...

- Cage kicks out. Ward tries to keep him on the mat with repeated elbows, and tries to lock in a Jersey Clover. However, Cage kicks him away into the corner. Cage gets to his feet and charges, but he misses. Ward then lands an impressive bridging German suplex!

1...
2...

- Kick out.

Kelly: That was a hell of a move by Ward there, taking his much larger opponent to the mat with the suplex.

Gettenpill: Absolutely. He's recovered from that early onslaught very well here. This kid looks like he has potential.

- Ward with a double leg takedown, which he turns into a jackknife pin.

1...
2...

- Cage powers out. Ward hits a European uppercut, and tries for a brainbuster, but Cage counters it, and ends up hitting a DDT. He goes for the Flashing Lights, but it is countered with an eye rake. Ward with a schoolboy roll-up!

1...
2...

- Another kick out from Cage, who seems to be getting angrier.

Kelly: A series of pinfall attempts here by Ward, which is smart strategy. However, it looks as if he's just rattled this Cage!

Gettenpill: Good grief that was lame.

- Cage goes for a big boot, but Ward ducks it. He tries to spring off with a crossbody, but Cage counters it into the Overnight Celebrity!

1...
2...
3!

Jerry Fish - Here is your winner...CAGE KING!

Kelly: A valiant effort from Griffin Ward, but a tremendous counter move by the more experienced Cage King earned him the win.

Gettenpill: He seems to be on a roll here, Kelly!


The Human Hate Machines V. The Nightflys

Jerry Fish - The following tag team contest is set for one fall, with a 20 minute time limit.

*Welcome to Hell*
Amigo and Square, flanked by The Hangman, make their way to the ring to a loud chorus of jeers.

Jerry Fish - Introducing first, accompanied by The Hangman, at a total combined weight of 424 pounds, Amigo and Square, The Human Hate Machines!

*Salmon Dance*
The Nightflys make their way to the ring, Double H slapping hands with the fans, while Fishmonger flops around like a fish out of water.

Jerry Fish - And their opponents, at a total combined weight of 415 pounds, Double H and The Fishmonger, The Nightflys!

The bell rings as Square and Double H start things off. They lock up and Square backs H into the corner. Referee John Creed asks for a clean break, but instead, Square chokes H in the corner. Creed begins counting.

“1!
2!
3!
4!”
Square breaks the choke.

He whips H into the opposite corner and hit’s a running forearm, then tag’s Amigo. Amigo enters and suplex’s H to the mat, then drops an elbow on the hapless grappler. Cover.

1
Kickout.

Amigo pulls H up and drags him to the corner and tag’s Square. Amigo holds H steady and Square delivers a malicious kidney punch to Double H! H grabs his side as Square swoops in and hit’s a big DDT! Cover!

1!
2!
Fishmonger breaks it up!

Amigo comes back in and grabs Fishmonger and tosses him to the outside. He then distracts Creed, while The Hangman picks Fishmonger up and drops him stomach first across his knee! He then rolls Fishmonger back in, as Double H get’s to his feet. Square grabs H and hit’s the SquarePlosion! Cover!

1!
2!
3!

Jerry Fish - Here are your winners, The Human Hate Machines!

Creed raises Square’s arm as Amigo sit’s Fishmonger up and delivers the Bom-ba-ye! The Hangman enters and climbs to the top rope, while Square holds Double H in position, Guillotine! Creed finally get’s the three men to back off so he can summon medical attention.

Gettenpill - A dominating win for the Human Hate Machines, Sean.

Kelly - The Truth Coalition has to be worried going into Saved by the Bell. These two are dangerous enough, but add dog collars to the mix? This situation just got more dangerous.

Gettenpill - Well, our main event is next, but first, Kris Kobain has something to say about his opponent.


Kobain is backstage.

Kobain: "Tonight the one man dynasty will show why I am the greatest thing in professional wrestling today. I'll leave you on your feet gasping for breath with everything I do. Titanothere I'll show you a true miracle and make even you look seem interesting."


Main Event: Titanothere V. Xavian Gunn

Jerry Fish: The following match is set for one fall with a fifteen minute time limit. First, from Seattle, Washington, weighing 185 pounds: Kris Kobain!

(“Siva” by The Smashing Pumpkins plays as Kobain makes his entrance. The CrapTron has his name flashing in blue letters that shatter as an image of him performing a shooting star press crashes through it. Kobain’s big moves are shown on screen with his name appearing again after every second or third move)

Fish: And his opponent, from La Brea California, weighing 366 pounds, the Monster of the Mesozoic Age: Titanothere!

(“Godzilla” by Blue Oyster Cult plays as Titan appears from the Gorilla Position. He lowers his head, paws both feet on the ground, and charges down the ramp. Climbing the steps he goes between the ropes to enter the ring, removes his helmet and shoulder pads, and folds his arms across his chest, watching Kobain)

Michael Gettenpill: The dynamic young rookie Kris Kobain has his work cut out for him, as he’s facing a man who nearly doubles his weight in Titanothere.

Sean Kelly: That’s true, Michael, but remember the saying: it’s not the size of the dog in the fight that matters, but the size of the fight in the dog. I expect a strong showing from the Grunge-inspired Grappler tonight.

(Referee Lloyd McFloyd calls both men to the center of the ring to give instructions, then motions for the bell to be rung. Titanothere raises his arm to initiate a test of strength, but Kobain will have none of it, telling him to talk to the hand as he walks away from his bigger foe. Titanothere shrugs and charges Kobain, missing with an elbow smash as Kobain ducks and pivots, connecting with a series of body blows. Titanothere staggers back but quickly recovers and headbutts his opponent twice. Kobain hits the mat and Titanothere grabs his arm to apply a wrist lock. Kobain winces in pain but kips up to both feet, then flips over and out of the hold. He then strikes Titanothere’s chest with a spinning heel kick!)

Kelly: Kobain uses his nimbleness to escape that wrist lock and then go back on offense. The man has what some like to call educated feet, Michael.

Gettenpill: No one besides you and that one other guy says ‘educated feet’, Sean.

(Kobain hits Titan with more open hand strikes then charges the ropes, leaping onto the second one and caroming off to hit Titanothere with a jumping kick to the side of the head. Titan stumbles back again, clutching his face. The wiry fighter continues to attack, wrapping his arms around his hunched opponent’s neck and driving him to the ground with a Twist of Fate! He makes the cover, but Titan kicks out immediately. Kobain gets up and does a standing moonsault onto Titanothere’s midsection, and again tries for a pin. McFloyd slaps the mat once before Titanothere throws Kobain off of him and lurches to his feet)

Gettenpill: A lot of offense from Kris Kobain so far, but it hasn’t been enough to put away the Monster of the Mesozoic Age.

Kelly: He’s probably going to have to risk going up top to make a high impact move if he wants to do enough damage to Titan to keep him down.

(Kobain does indeed run to the ropes and again leaps onto the second one, but this time flips backward to try and connect with a Lionsault. Titan’s ready and manages to catch Kobain over his shoulder. The big man slams him to the mat and then follows up with an elbow drop before going for the pin, but Kobain puts his foot on the rope. Both men rise and warily circle each other, moving back to the center of the ring)

Gettenpill: Both men are trying to get their bearings before continuing.

Kelly: This is where Kris Kobain should be pressing his advantage. He needs to continue the hit and run tactics, and get Titanothere sucking wind so he can move in for the kill.

(Titanothere lunges forward, but Kobain sidesteps the charge and connects with an enziguri. The kick to the back of the head causes Titan to drop to his knees. Kobain gets up and moves behind Titanothere and applies a chinlock. The bigger man struggles to escape but can’t. The ref bends down to ask if Titan submits but the Monster of the Mesozoic Age refuses. Kobain stomps on Titanothere’s back to knock him down further, but can’t get him to budge. Finally, Titan manages to loop an arm under Kobain’s leg so he loses his balance and falls. Titanothere rolls himself backwards in a reverse somersault, over the prone Kobain, breaking the hold. He grabs onto Kobain and slowly, awkwardly stands with the smaller wrestler draped across his shoulders!)

Gettenpill: Now its Titan’s turn to show some nimbleness!

Kelly: Not since I’ve seen him balance four plates coming from the Kraft Service table have I seen the Mesozoic Monster show such agility.

(Titanothere gives a shout of triumph and begins to spin around the middle of the ring, Kobain helplessly flailing around to try and free himself. The big man lets him down and bounces off the ropes to try and connect with a lariat on his dizzied foe, but Kobain does a split to duck under it!)

Crowd: Ooh!

(Titanothere hits the ropes on the opposite side and doubles back with his head down to spear Kobain but the wiry grappler leapfrogs over him!)

Crowd: Aah!

(Titanothere stops at the ropes this time and pauses to catch his breath. When he turns to face Kobain he’s hit with a superkick that knocks him to the mat!)

Kelly: An unbelievable display of instinct from a discombobulated Kris Kobain! He was able to dodge two attacks that should have smeared him across the ring, and then put Titanothere down with a kick to the jaw!

Gettenpill: Could this be Kris Kobain’s first victory in the WWCF?!

(Kobain shakes off his vertigo and stares down at Titanothere. He scampers to the closest turnbuckle and climbs it, putting himself in position for his finisher)

Gettenpill: I think Titanothere is about to feel the Afterburn, Sean!

(Kobain points to the crowd, then turns and leaps upward, executing a Shooting Star Press that hits nothing but mat as Titan manages to roll out of the way. He gets up and grabs Kobain in a waist lock, lifts him, then throws him backwards into the ring post with a release German Suplex! Kobain is still tangled in the ropes when Titan pulls him away for the pin. He presses both of Kobain’s shoulders to the mat and waits for the ref to make the count: One, Two, Kickout!)

Kelly: Kris Kobain, despite being nearly squahed by that German Suplex to the turnbuckle, fights on! Unbelievable!

Gettenpill: I’d say Titanothere agrees with that assessment, Sean.

(The Monster of the Mesozoic Age looks dumbstruck. He rises and looms over his opponent, who is still writhing on the mat. He scoops up Kobain and puts him across his shoulders, grabbing hold of Kobain’s dangling legs and putting his other arm over his chest and pulls down roughly, he applies a Torture Rack!)

Kelly: This has got to be it, Michael. Titanothere is going after Kris Kobain’s injured back, and with his strength it’s only a matter of time before the Renegade Rocker submits.

(Referee Floyd McFloyd asks Kris Kobain if he submits, but the young high flyer shakes his head no. Titan begins to jump up and down, increasing the pressure on Kobain’s back. Again Kobain is asked if he gives in and he again refuses. Titanothere yells and pushes downward with both arms, bending his opponent further. McFloyd grabs Kobain’s limp arm, raises it, and lets it drop. He does it again. After the third time he turns and calls for the bell, but doesn’t see Kobain’s hand stay up! Titanothere quickly sets Kobain to the mat)

Fish: Here is your winner: the Monster from the Mesozoic Age, Titanothere!

(Titan lifts a fist to celebrate his victory but looks at Kobain, who is struggling to his feet and arguing with the ref)

Gettenpill: Kobain not happy with the call, Sean.

Kelly: He has good reason to be. Referee Floyd McFloyd ended the match a little too quickly, in my opinion.

(Kris Kobain is still vehemently complaining to McFloyd, who is trying to calm him. Titanothere goes over to the two and puts his hand on Kobain’s shoulder. The smaller wrestler turns, glares at Titan, then shoves him away, a move that causes him to clutch his back in agony. He exits the ring to a mixed reaction of cheers and boos as he limps up the ramp as Titanothere stares at him non-plussed).

Gettenpill - Well, Kobain hasn‘t won a match yet, but he‘s certainly made a statement to this crowd here tonight.

Kelly - Titanothere also making a strong statement with another big win in the Heatz!!1 main event!

Gettenpill - Well, that‘s all the time we have tonight. Don‘t forget to tune into NiteRaw tomorrow.

Kelly - For Michael Gettenpill, I‘m Sean Kelly. Goodnight.


Writing Credits: Evil M, Headbanger Man, Kris Kobain, and Titanothere