Monday Niteraw - March 9, 2009
3/30/09
grbjazzman V. LittleNaitch w/ The Sam
Michael Muffer- This is your opening contest tonight on WWCF Nite-Raw and it's scheduled for one fall! Introducing first representing The Pride, GRBJAZZMAN!!!
Jazzman struts his way down to the ring to the cheers of the fans and gives a young child in the front row his fedora.
And his opponent, accompanied to the ring by The Sam, representing The Family and one half of the self proclaimed greatest tag team ever... LITTLE NAITCH!!!
The lights in the WWCF arena flicker as the robed Little Naitch comes out to the ring with The Sam in tow. He enters the ring and the bell rings.
Little Natich gets the action started with pushing the smaller Jazzman back into the corner and starts working the chops. He lights up Jazzman's chest and whips into the other corner. Jazzman pulls the up and over and Naitch runs underneath him into the corner. Jazzman then hits a big judo throw back to the center of the ring and locks in a armbar.
*As the action in the ring continues, KGX shows up and takes a seat on the stage.*
Little Naitch counters the armbar into a hammer lock and whips Jazzman off the ropes and hits him with an atomic drop as he comes back. Naitch then hits the ropes and takes Jazzman down with a clothesline. Naitch continues to capitalize on his momentum by nailing a running knee drop to Jazzman and the covers him, but he only gets two.
Naitch continues to get the upper hand on Jazzman by locking in a half boston crab. The crowd cheers to urge Jazzman to the ropes and he makes it there with very little time to spare. Naitch breaks the hold and he pulls Jazzman back to the center of the ring and looks to lock in his figure four leglock. As he goes for the figure four, Jazzman reaches up and rolls up Naitch into a small package, BUT HE ONLY GETS TWO!
Jazzman gets up with a rush of adrenaline and hits the ropes and levels Naitch with a huge Yakuza Kick! Jazzman looks out toward the fans as he sets up Little Naitch for the Such Sweet Thunder, but he steals a glance at the stage and sees KGX. He taunts him to come down to the ring, but KGX remains stoic on the stage. Jazzman gets up top and is ready to hit Little Naitch with the SST, but he is pushed off the top rope by Naitch! Little Naitch then hits a top rope knee drop to Jazzman and goes to lock in the figure four. He locks it in, but the Damage is already done. Jazzman has no fight left in him and is forced to tap out to the figure four.
Ladies and Gentlemen, your winner, via tapout... LITTLE NAITCH!!
The General of the Monkey Army V. Madman Szalinski
The following contest is scheduled for one fall...
(King Kong 2004 theme)
Making his way to the ring, accompanied by his pet monkey, from Lansing, Michigan, weighing in at 225lbs, General of the Monkey Army!
(Skinhead Skinhead from the 'Romper Stomper' soundtrack)
And his opponent, from the booth back into the ring, Madman Szalinski!
- The General's monkey settles on the ring steps, as the match gest underway. General tries to use his quickness to begin with, but runs into a shoulderblock from Madman. General ducks two clotheslines and goes for an early roll-up; Madman kicks out at 1. Madman soon takes over with a snapmare takeover and a low dropkick for 2. Madman locks in a reverse chinlock for a minute or so. General eventually gets to his feet and delivers elbows to the gut, but eats a clothesline, again for a 2 count.
- Madman unloads with right hands on General, and backs him into the corner. He goes for a Stinger splash, but General moves out of the way. General stomps away to the midsection of Madman, and sets him up for a superplex. Madman blocks it, and knocks General to the mat. He attempts a splash from the top, however General evades it. General makes the cover, but it only gets a 2. The General begins to stomp away on Madman, working over the legs for a bit, before hitting his patented monkey flip out of the corner. He goes for a diving headbutt from the top, however this time Madman moves out of the way. Madman covers for 2.
- Madman positions himself to deliver the Insane Clothesline, however the pet monkey climbs onto the apron and distracts Madman. Szalinski stoops down to verbally berate the simian, but receives a vicious running kneelift for his trouble. The General then locks in the Monkey Wrench texas cloverleaf, and Szalinski taps in 20 seconds or so.
Here is your winner, by submission, The General Of The Monkey Army!
Tyfo w/ The Sam V. The Tank w/ Seth Drakin
Muffer – The following contest is set for one fall.
(Operation Ground and Pound – Dragon force)
Making his way to the ring first, at the height of 6’6, weighing in at 265 lbs. From Los Angeles, California. Accompanied by Seth Drakin, representing The Crusade.
The Tank!
(Tank and Seth make their way to the ring)
And his opponent.
(The New Blackjacks theme)
At the height of 6’3, weighing in at 245 lbs. From Dallas, Texas. Accompanied by his manager, The Sam. Representing The Family. Tyfo!
(Tyfo and The Sam make their way to the ring)
Bell rings
Tyfo and Tank circle the ring a few times before they both go for a lockup. Tyfo pushes Tank towards the turnbuckle. The ref begins a 5 count, Tyfo releases at 3. Tyfo steps back and slaps Tank. Tank shrugs it off.
Tyfo and Tank circle the ring a second time; once again they go for a lock up. Tank manages to push Tyfo towards the opposite turnbuckle. Tank steps back and slaps Tyfo. Tyfo shrugs it off.
Men circle the ring a third time, they go for a lock up but both men kick each other in the mid section. They then start throwing punches. Each on connecting until Tyfo throws a punch, Tank ducks it and Tank hits Tyfo with a haymaker, which sends Tyfo reeling. Tyfo rolls to the outside where The Sam meets him to give some advice.
Tyfo gets back into the ring and holds his hands out for feats of strength. Tank holds his hands out and they lock hands. Tyfo pushes Tank so his back bends backwards. Tank starts pushing and sends Tyfo’s back bending backwards. They go back up to a vertical position where Tyfo sends a knee to Tanks mid section.
Tyfo sends Tank to the turnbuckle before sitting atop the top turnbuckle. Tyfo climbs up to hit the “Tumbleweed” but Seth climbs up and the apron and prevents Tyfo from hitting it. The referee tells Seth to get down but Seth refuses. The referee calls for the bell.
Muffer – The winner of this match as a result of a DQ, TYFO!
The Sam and Seth climb into the ring as an argument ensues between all 4 people. Evil La Parka runs through the crowd with a steel chair in hand. The Sam and Tyfo step back with their hands in front of them. Littlenaitch runs out and goes straight for Evil La Parka, tackling him down. Tank and Seth run out of the ring but Seth gets caught in the ropes. Naitch grabs the steel chair and raises it to hit Seth with. But The Sam grabs the chair from Naitch’s hands and throws it away. Naitch and The Sam begin arguing with Tyfo trying to calm them down. The Crusade head to the back watching on as The Sam and Naitch argue into the commercial break.
Metylerca w/ M.O.P. V. Starshine w/ Square
Announcer - The following contest is scheduled for one fall and has a 30 minute time limit.
*Baker Street by Gerry Rafferty plays as Starshine makes his way out along with Square in street clothes.*
Announcer - Accompanied by Square, he weighs in tonight at 224 pounds. He is the self proclaimed 'Technical Professional'. He is Starshine.
*Starshine enters the ring and asks for a mic.*
Amigo - Oh great, just what we need. Starshine has a mic.
Starshine - You know it's kind of funny. Yeah, it is. Last week my partner standing next to me, Square was cheated out of his assured victory against M.O.P. Now apparently some people think this somehow affects our chances at the titles. See I don't see it that way. Tag team wrestling and singles competition are two different fields of expertise. As it so happens our undeniable strengths lie in our ability to dissect, and break apart our opposing forces partner, by partner. So I ask you Pride, what did you actually achieve? One of you proved you could get lucky in one night. But I've got some bad news for you Metylerca. Tonight you're in the ring with the ring general, the Technical Professional to be exact. Now I'm not going to get into the details, but I want you to understand lightening doesn't strike twice. I'll prove that to you tonight. In fact I'm so sure that I predict that this match will end in less than five minutes. So Metylerca, so M.O.P. come out here and try to learn from the best there is.
*Metallica's Whiplash starts playing. Metylerca and M.O.P. both holding their tag team titles enter with a look of determination.*
Announcer - Accompanied by his partner M.O.P, he weighs in at 230 pounds. He is one half of the WWCF tag team champions, 'Lightening Steel' Metylerca.
*Starshine exits the ring as Metylerca enters and talks with Square.*
Starshine - Hey ref! Ref! He's got a weapon! Tell him to take off those studded wrist bands.
The referee approaches Metylerca and explains that he needs to remove his wrist bands. Metylerca is defiant at first but M.O.P. encourages him to comply and he hands them over. Starshine slowly makes his way back onto the ring apron, and finally into the ring corner opposite his opponent.
The bell rings.
Both start off with a slow feeling out process as Metylerca locks in a side headlock. Starshine reverses into an arm wrench and says; "Yeah, this is how you do it". Metylerca begins a reversal technique before Starshine simply releases the grip on his arm. He makes his way back to the corner, facing the crowd and pointing to himself and shouting; "Technical Professional" as the crowd boo's.
Both lock up again in the middle of the ring and Starshine manages to wrench in a side headlock. Metylerca backs him into the ropes and launches him off and sending him into the opposite ropes. Starshine rebounds back and attempts a clothesline but Metylerca ducks and rolls him up in a schoolboy.
1...
2...
3
Announcer - YOUR WINNER... AT FORTY NINE SECONDS... METYYYYYYYYYYYYLERCAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
*Starshine looks on in complete shock and disbelief as Square argues that the pin was only a two count. The Pride members high five and make their way to the back while the crowd mocks the NAH by chanting '49'*
Hardcore Match: Jonathan Michaels V. “Evil La Parka”
The following Hardcore match is set for one fall.
(La Parka’s WCW theme hits)
Introducing first, from Mexico City, Mexico, weighing in at 225 pounds, the number one contender to the WWCF Hardcore Championship, “Evil La Parka!”
(Original Prankster plays)
And his opponent, from Los Angeles, California, weighing in at 240 pounds, Jonathan Michaels!
La Parka starts off by throwing the chair he carried to the ring at Michaels, who catches it and takes a swing, causing Parka to scramble out of the ring. La Parka grabs a garbage can from under the ring and reenters, only for Michaels to knock him back to the outside with a chairshot. Michaels follows La Parka to the floor, where he grabs a baseball bat from under the ring. Michaels waits for La Parka to get up, and swings, but Parka ducks it and kicks the bat out of Jonathan’s hands. Jonathan and La Parka lock up on the outside, and Michaels tosses La Parka into the crowd control barrier. He gets a running start, but La Parka lowers his head and head butts the charging Michaels in the ribs, before tossing him into the crowd. La Parka grabs a chair and uses it to launch himself onto Michaels in the crowd. La Parka pulls Michaels up off the floor and nails him with a chairshot, before tossing back over the barrier. La Parka dives off the top of the barrier, but Michaels moves out of the way, and La Parka dives headfirst into the ring apron. As La Parka staggers, dazed, Michaels picks up the baseball bat and cracks Parka in the ribs with it. As La Parka goes down, Michaels hits him again, this time in the back of the head. Michaels covers Parka, but only get’s a 2-count.
Michaels tosses Parka back in the ring and follows him, armed with a chair. Michaels sets the chair in the corner, in between the top and middle turnbuckles. La Parka is up and he hits Michaels with the trash can. Parka comes off the ropes with a LionSault, but Michaels rolls out of the way. Michaels goes to toss Parka into the chair, but La Parka reverses it, and Michaels hit’s the corner with the chair hard. La Parka quickly grabs the chair and lays Michaels out with it. He follows up with the X-Ray and get’s the 3-count.
Here is your winner, “Evil La Parka!”
La Parka continues his assault after the bell, laying into Michaels with the chair. Pretty soon, Michaels is wearing a crimson mask. La Parka places the chair around Michaels’ throat and is about to jump off the rope, when Evil Masked wordlifeecw runs down to the ring, prompting La Parka to get out of dodge. Wordlifeecw checks on Michaels, and yells for help, as EMTs and several other wrestlers from the back come down to help. Wordlifeecw stares up the ramp at La Parka, fuming as La Parka taunts him from the stage.
Head Detective Aaron Enigma V. TromboneMan w/ The Sam
The following contest is set for one fall.
(In The Mood)
Introducing first, being accompanied by The Sam, from Melbourne, Australia, weighing in at 240 pounds, he is the TromboneWeight Champion, and he is Mr. Money in the Bank, TromboneMan!
“Elementary, my dear Watson!”
(Know Your Enemy)
And his opponent, from Concord, New Hampshire, but currently residing in Chicago, Illinois, and weighing in at 256 pounds, Head Detective, Aaron Enigma!
Right from the start TM charges Aaron, spearing him to the ground and laying in a series of haymakers. Aaron blocks msot of the punches and manages to flip over so he is on top and starts punching back. The ref comes in and breaks it up. Both men get to their feet. Aaron extends his hand to shake TM's. TM reluctantly shakes Aaron's hand but then delivers a toe kick and hits a snap suplex on Aaron. TM celebrates with a quick parade around the ring playing an invisible trombone, but Aaron trips him up and knocks him down. Aaron puts TM's left arm in a keylock and wrenches his right arm back in a chickenwing. TM desparately moves around and eventually gets a foot on the bottom rope. Aaron reluctantly breaks the hold.
TM and Aaron start brawling in the center of the ring. Aaron starts getting the upper hand but is cut off by a knee to the midsection from TM. TM goes to bounce off the ropes and comes back attempting to hit a clothesline. Aaron ducks it though and runs for the ropes as well. On the rebound Aaron ducks another clothesline and immediately springs to grab TM around the upperbody with his right arm. Aaron plants TM on the mat with a big sideslam.
TM rolls out of the ring trying to get a breather. Aaron gets out and follows him. TM runs around the ring with Aaron chasing him. TM rolls back into the ring and catches Aaron with a haymaker as he tries to get in through the middle rope. TM hits a neckbreaker on Aaron while Aaron is between the ropes, and his head comes crashing down on the mat. TM goes for the pin but Aaron barely kicks out before the 3 count.
TM applies a Fujiwara armbar on Aaron. Aaron quickly makes it to the ropes and TM breaks the hold just before he gets DQ'd. As Aaron slowly gets to his feet, TM runs for the ropes intending on finally hitting that clothesline. However, Aaron counters with a reverse STO and locks in the Extreme Interrogation on TM. TM quickly searches for a way out of the hold, but Aaron wrenches back as far as he can. TM reverses the hold into a pin though, and Aaron is forced to release it before he loses the match. Aaron gets up first and picks up TM. He sets up to hit the Brillant Deduction, but TM counters it and picks Aaron up instead. TM hits the C-Note out of nowhere and pins Aaron for the win.
Here is your winner, TromboneMan!
Main Event: Stryker Duck Silence V. King Motor-Colt and Above Average
Michael Muffer: The following tag team match is the MAIN EVENT! And is scheduled for ONE FALL!
*Drums and bagpipes trill then phase into the DarkWing Duck theme. Milo and Stryker walk out, holding the World Title belt up, one hand each on the dented, green sprayed belt*
Michael Muffer: Introducing first, from...
*Stryker hands the belt to Milo and charges the ring, blowing the green mist into Muffer's eyes and throws him out of the ring*
You know damn well who we are. We're the foundation of this company, we're the franchise, we're the main event and we are the current *smirks* JOINT HOLDERS of the World Title, and we're here to get the respect we DESERVE!
*Milo gets on the mic*
We are StrykerDUCKSILENCE!!
The pair pose for the crowd with their stolen belt, Motor Colt and Above Average aren't waiting for the music, they hit the ring running and a brawl commences. MC and Stryker and AA and Milo. The referee struggles to get order in the match. MC sends Stryker reeling with a sharp European Uppercut, tosses him from the ring and runs over to aid AA. Double Irish Whip on Milo, who ducks the double clothesline, comes back off the ropes ABOVE AVERAGE WITH A EUROPEAN UPPERCUT OF HIS OWN! ALMOST TOOK MILO'S HEAD OFF!
AA immediately on Milo with the Bow And Arrow, stretching him out. MC runs off the ropes, looking for a double team manouvre...CUT OFF BY STRYKER WITH THE SPRINGBOARD CROSSBODY! Stryker drops an elbow on AA to break the hold. Both MC and Milo roll out and we actually get the match underway! Stryker stays on the much bigger AA and starts throwing chops and palm strikes as AA gets to his feet. Belly To Belly attempt...AA shoves him off! AA goes for the Superkick...ducked by Stryker and SINGLE LEG TAKEDOWN!! Stryker locks on the heel hook, and reaches out to his corner...MILO TAGGED IN! Stryker keeps the heel hook on, and MILO OFF THE TOP ROPE WITH A KNEE DROP TO THE LOWER BACK!! Milo takes over on the lower half with a Boston Crab, and Stryker locks in the front facelock. The referee calls for Stryker to leave the ring, but he won't break the hold!! He threatens to spit the mist at the referee too, but MC is in! Vicious stomps to Stryker, he grabs him and throws him out of the ring again. Milo still has the Boston Crab on the struggling AA, but MC comes in...GERMAN SUPLEX ON MILO!! MC off the ropes...STRYKER IN WITH THE BELT SHOT ON MC!! THE REFEREE HAS CALLED FOR THE BELL TO THIS MESS!! ABOVE AVERAGE AND MOTOR-COLT WIN BY DQ!!
Stryker is stalking AA with the belt...LEG LARIAT TO THE BACK OF STRYKER'S HEAD!! FINAL THOUGHT LOCKED IN!! Stryker is tapping but the bell has already gone!! Milo staggers up to help, BUT TAKES THE SUPERKICK OUT OF NOWHERE FROM AA!! MC drops the hold as AA hands him the World Title and the two champions pose over the fallen Stryker Duck Silence.
King Motor-Colt and Above Average celebrate in the ring, posing to the crowd. Their attention is then suddenly drawn by Glen Miller's "In The Mood" playing over the PA system. All 4 competitors of the match look towards the entrance ramp as TromboneMan comes out of the curtains, holding and clutching his Money In The Bank briefcase, looking towards all 4 men in the ring as another edition of WWCF NiteRaw comes to a close.
Match writing credits for this week’s episodes of Heatz!!1 and NiteRaw go to: TTS, The Sam, grbjazzman, Bring Back The Headbangers, Starshine, Evil Masked wordlifeecw, Aaron Enigma, and Stryker Dark Silence.
