Monday Niteraw - September 7, 2009
9/14/09
Welcome to Monday NiteRaw! I’m Gorilla Tim Hoss, and with me, the unflappable Jesse King!
Gorilla, we are a week removed from Rumble in the Jungle and on the road to GookerMania II!
Right on, Jess! After the Rumble, we now know what the main event will be at GookerMania!
Above Average overcame 27 other opponents to win the Guerrilla Rumble, in an amazing match!
We also saw a NEW WWCF World Champion crowned, when Jazzman defeated Seth Drakin to capture the gold, after Mr. D-Day Dave ordered a restart following Seth‘s initial win for the Championship of Honor!
The PPV was amazing, but what about tonight?!
Jess, tonight we do indeed have an amazing show! We‘ll see Above Average defend the Inter-Forum Championship against M.O.P., and The Deadly and The Sinful challenge for the WWCF World Tag Team Championships as well!
Plus we have Jonathan Michaels V. King Motor-Colt, Aaron Enigma in a handicap match, and much more!
* 'Lilac Lane' hits as the new world champion makes his his way to the ring, exchanging high-fives with fans. The fans chant "Jazzman" as he enters the ring and soaks it all in before starting.
Ya know, now I'm happy! I'm standing in a spot people never thought I would be and I am the NEW World Champion!
*Crowd roars*
There are alot of people who I'd love to thank, but this isn't the time or place. Plus I told you, the fans, that I would go through and survey the landscape of this company now that I'm the champion.
First to Seth Drakin, you gave me a great fight, but I was better when it counted. Your demons caught up with you and you were toppled. Now you face a fight for your career and your title at Gookermania, and I'm pulling for littlenaitch to end it!
Now, onto a dear old friend and a new friend. M.O.P. you and I have not seen eye-to-eye for sometime now, bujt I wish you the best of luck in suceeding where I had failed in taking that title from Above Average. Aaron, you to are a great friend and if you ever need someone to stand with you in a battle you can bet that I'll be there 100%
And now, on to the most important matter of business going on here in this company. The main event of Gookermania! Guys, can you put the shot on up the Craptron?
*The audience turns to the screen as they see the Gookermania II logo fade into Jazzman and Above Average in a staredown*
Above Average, well done last week sir. Not only did you retain the Inter-forum title, but you also won the Guerrilla Rumble and the chance to face me at Gookermania. Now I'd be a fool if I told you that I didn't feel like you were my toughest opponent yet inside these ropes. I've never beaten you here.
*Jazzman changes tone and gets very serious*
But you best believe that I'm matured into the leader of this company since we last tangled. I slayed the evil dragon known as Seth Drakin, and you sir are starting to show your true colors. To me now, you are a shell of the man I fought in that epic ladder match back at King of Wrestlecrap. You've turned you back on this company, your own beliefs, these fans, and most importantly your friend Motor-Colt.
Avarice gets you nowhere in life, and gets you even less in this business. In the end what do we have if not our own pride and self-worth? I've taught that lesson very well in the last few months and at Gookermania, I'll defeat you and show you the error of your ways by retaining my World Title!
Strong words from the World Champion.
I cannot wait until GookerMania, Gorilla!
Ladies and gentlemen, earlier this week, we received the latest episode of the Boiler Room, and we would like to play that for you before we have our opening contest.
*The Boiler Room*
Welcome everyone to The Boiler Room!
ON TONIGHT'S SHOW I am joined by none other than the General. of the Monkey. Army!
So, how did you become the General of the Monkey Army?
Well it started out when I was shipped to Africa. Our platoon was sent out to do some training, but I stop to go to the bathroom and that is when I was kidnapped by platypuses.
Platypuses you say?
Yes one of the most evil creatures on this planet. Some people thinks the shark is the most evil, but a shark is a kitten compared to a platypus. Anyway I was just about to be thrown into a pot of boiling water until a group of monkeys came and save my life. Then they proceed to tell me that they have been in a great war with the platypus for a long time and they needed more help and so I...
So you claim, that the monkeys, can talk to you?
Yes. Even I was shocked that they could speak English so well.
Your epic tale enthralls me, BRB, so what, happens, next?
Well, I lead them into a great battle and we fought the platypus army for days, and when the last platypus fell we stood in victory and the gave me the honor of The General of the Monkey Army and a choosing of a wife.
You mean to imply that you're married to a female monkey?
Yes. Her name is Koko. We're expecting our first child.
You even consummated the marriage!?
Indeed. I admit I was kinda hesitant to do it with a monkey, but by God she was amazing. She does thing were she takes her tail and wraps it around my di...
That's enough! You're sick and deluded and neither Corporate nor I is interested in you or your kind!
Hey don't knock it until you try it.
"Knock it?" If you ever show up in my Boiler Room again, I'm gonna knock my big, massive pipe wrench right into you and your spouse's faces and then I'm gonna take your little Tinker and toss her into my furnace and have her for dinner! [size=3]Now get on out there and get your monkey ass kicked!
*BRB turns to the camera*
Thanks for joining me in The Boiler Room!
Now get outta here!
Hardcore Challenge; Monkey V. Allegiance: Cageking V. The General of the Monkey Army
The following contest is a 5 minute hardcore challenge! If Cageking wins, he will gain possession of the General‘s pet monkey Tinker! But if Cageking loses, he will become The General’s servant until after GookerMania!
*Cageking walks to the ring rapping his theme song*
Introducing first, from Los Angeles, California, weighing in at 295 pounds, CageKing!
*King Kong 2004*
and his opponent, from Lansing, Michigan, weighing in at 225 pounds, The General of the Monkey Army!
The General and Cageking trade punches at the bell. Cageking tosses The General to the outside and follows him. On the floor, Cageking grabs a chair and cracks The General in the head with it. Cover.
1
Kickout.
Cageking pulls The General up and rams his head into the ring apron, then follows up with a backbreaker across the knee! Cover!
1!
2!
Kickout!
Cageking tries to whip The General into the crowd barrier, but it’s reversed. The General charges at Cageking, who backbody drops him over the barrier! Cageking climbs over the barrier and continues his attack! The two fight there way through the crowd, with Cageking using any weapons he finds on the floor. Cageking hit’s The General with a Sprite bottle! DDT! Cover!
1!
2!
Kickout!
Cageking continues to beat The General through the crowd and into the backstage area. The General tries to fight back, grabbing a broom and swinging it, but Cageking ducks… FLASHING LIGHTS!!! COVER!!!
1!
2!
The bell rings. Cageking and the referee both look confused.
Ladies and gentlemen, the 5 minute time limit has expired! Therefore, The General survives the challenge!
What a bad break for Cageking. He had it won, only for time to expire right before the 3-count!
That’s the way it goes Gorilla. Win some, lose some.
All I know is that The General is a very lucky man tonight. Up next, Aaron Enigma in a handicap match, taking on Tyfo and The Boiler Room Brawler!
Aaron Enigma V. Tyfo and The Boiler Room Brawler
"Take The Power Back" plays as Aaron enters the ring. He walks down the ramp, a look of pure focus in his eyes. He gets in the ring and asks for a mic. He looks out to the crowd and speaks.
I originally asked for tonight off so I could recoup from the PPV. However Sam did not feel that was a good idea. Obviously he is worried that if I were to find the traitor Corporate may break apart due to mistrust. What happened to Corporate being a unit? A well-oiled machine? A team of people that work together? Seems to me that some people can't do that in your company. Hell I was ready to quit, and M.O.P. saved me. A man that you hired to destroy me just saved me. You could've been rid of me, but M.O.P. didn't want that. Do you know why Sam? Do you know why Corporate. M.O.P. sees it but the rest of you don't.
Where would Corporate go if I left. I've been the main instigator in this war between myself and the rest of you. If I was gone, you would have nothing to do. No one else to feud with. I seem to be the only one that sees Corporate a whole...a virus. If I were gone though, there would be no point to have Corporate around anymore. What can you guys do, sit on your pedestal? It would get awfully boring at the top with no one to play King of the Mountain with now wouldn't it?
You need me Corporate just as much as I need you. Without you I have no purpose and without me you guys would have nothing to do. Tonight, Tyfo and Boiler Room Brawler continue the war with me. Give it all you got or you just might find yourselves losing the battle. That's a saying isn't it? You may have won the battle but you haven't won the war. That's how I feel about this whole thing. Time after time you guys beat me, but the war isn't over until Corporate is dissolved or I am dead. So let's go you two. Let's see what you got!
*New Blackjacks Theme*
And his opponents, at a total combined weight of 595 pounds, Tyfo and The Boiler Room Brawler!
The two men jump in the ring and stare down with Aaron. The ref signals for the bell but suddenly "Simply The Best" plays. Whitey Fats comes down the entrance ramp holding a mic. He gets into the ring and says:
Well, well, well. A jackass and an extra from Hard Cops 17 are gonna double team my boy. Well the Phat One has talked to boys in the back,. and now this a tag team match!
The other three men look shocked but accept it. Aaron quickly shakes hands with Whitey before motioning him outside. Tyfo stays in the ring and he and Aaron lock up the second the bell rings. Aaron gets the upperhand with a headlock takeover. However he lets go. Tyfo gets up wondering why Aaron broke the hold. He gets his answer when Aaron delivers a vicious right hand and doesn't stop. Aaron continues to slam his fist into Tyfo's head. The crowd starts cheering as Aaron sees red. He stops and looks to the crowd and screams "THIS BATTLE IS OURS!" before tagging in Whitey. Whitey goes over to Tyfo and attempts to lock in an abdominal stretch but Tyfo is able to scramble out and tag in BRB.
BRB gets in the ring and locks up with Whitey. The two trade hammerlocks until BRB delivers a kick to the midsection. He throws Whitey into the ropes and hits an overhead release German suplex on him. He then puts Whitey in a bow and arrow hold. Whitey screams in pain but BRB breaks the hold and throws Whitey into Aaron's corner. He motions for Aaron to get in the ring. Aaron tags himself in and gets in the ring, staring down with BRB. The two lock up with BRB getting the upperhand for a moment. However, Aaron delivers a kick to the stomach and DDT's BRB out of nowhere. HE goes for the pin
1...
2...
BRB gets his shoulder up!
Aaron lifts up BRB, intent on finishing the match quickly. He sets up for the Brilliant Deduction. However, BRB counters and instead pushes Aaron back. Aaron falls into his corner and BRB charges. BRB attempts to go for a spear but Aaron dodges and BRB's shoulder hits the ringpost. Aaron tags Whitey and Whitey lifts up BRB for a powerbomb. Aaron leaps to the top rope and the two hit a Fameasser Powerbomb combo that the crowd erupts in cheers for. Whitey goes to pin BRB.
1...
2...
Tyfo jumps in the ring and breaks up the pin!
The ref makes Tyfo leave the ring but while his back is turned BRB hits a low blow on Whitey. BRB takes advantage and hits a big slam on Whitey. He then turns and charges at Aaron, knocking Aaron off the ring apron. He then turns around and begins to attack Whitey. He hits a vicious series of hits. He then locks in a vicious crossface submission. Whitey crawls to the ropes and breaks it but not before taking a big chunk of hurt from it.
Aaron, having been knocked down to the outside, decides to takes matters into his own hands. He sneaks under the ring and grabs a steel chair. He crawls under the ring and comes out next to Tyfo. He picks up the chair and WHAM hits Tyfo in the back with it. The ref sees it and calls for the bell, however Aaron isn't finished. He follows up with a huge chair shot on Tyfo's head, knocking him out cold. He then jumps in the ring. BRB notices and attempts to crawl out of the ring. However Whitey grabs his ankle, preventing him from escaping. He looks down to see Whitey mouthing the world "payback". Aaron charges and nearly decapitates BRB with the chairshot. He hits a couple shots to the back for good measure and throws the chair to Whitey who gets a shot in of his own. He shakes hands with Whitey and once again asks for a mic. He looks at the downed forms of BRB and Tyfo and shouts into the mic, motioning for Whitey to get out of the ring and grab Tyfo.
THE BATTLE IS OURS! Now if I remember correctly, there was supposed to be some sort of fire if I lose. However that did not seem to occur. Now I was not expecting Whitey's help in this match honestly. He did turn out very helpful though. You see, my goal tonight wasn't to win honestly. It was to make a statement to Corporate. And now, you will see that statement!
He gets out of the ring and grabs another chair. He gets back in the ring and places them on the canvas. He picks up BRB while Whitey picks up Tyfo. Whitey hits Tyfo with a Burning Hammer onto the chair while Aaron hits BRB with the Brilliant Deduction onto the chair. Aaron then picks up the mic and shouts again.
THE BATTLE IS OURS! THE WAR IS MINE! THE POWER WILL BECOME MINE! I WILL TAKE THE POWER BACK!
Aaron drops the mic and Whitey and he exit to a huge eruption of cheers.
Well, Aaron and Whitey don’t pick up the win, but I don’t think it matters. This wasn’t about a win or a loss, it was about making a statement.
Well, they definitely succeeded there. Aaron is out to put an end to Corporate, and it looks like Whitey’s ready to lend his support!
Another man who’s looking to put an end to Corporate, or at least one member of it, is Square. He takes on his brother, Relegate Hunter, NEXT!
Square V. Relegate Hunter
The following contest is set for one fall, with a 20 minute time limit!
*Smile Like You Mean It*
Introducing first, from Brighton, England, weighing in at 190 pounds, Relegate Hunter!
*I Don’t Care*
And his opponent, from Preston, England, weighing in at 210 pounds, Square!
Square and Relegate lock up. Square locks in a hammerlock, but Hunter reverses it into a side headlock. Square get’s out of it with a back drop! Cover.
1
Kickout.
Square bounces off the ropes, but Relegate catches him with a clothesline! Hunter suplexes Square, then follows up with an elbow drop. Cover!
1
Kickout.
Hunter climbs to the middle rope and goes for a blockbuster, but Square catches him! Brainbuster! Cover!
1!
2!
Kickout!
Square pulls Relegate up and hit’s a standing dropkick! Relegate rolls to his feet, but Square knocks him back down with a lariat! Cover!
1!
2!
Kickout!
Square pulls Hunter off the mat and delivers the SquarePlosion! Cover!
1!
2!
3!
Here is your winner, Square!
And Square picks up the win over his brother and former partner, Relegate Hunter.
I always said Square was the star of that tag team, and this proved it!
Square certainly is on a roll here. The sky is the limit for this young Superstar!
*The lights go out and something comes up on the titantron*
He is psycho
He is a crazy
He is a danger to society
He is EVIL
EVIL LA PARKA
On October 26 at Night Of The Wrestling Zombies the WWCF will never be the same. The True Evil One will finally reveal who he really is to the world.
Backstage, we see Evil M.
So, two FORMER allies of mine are going to face each other to work out their aggression. How amusing. King Motor-Colt, as far as I’m concerned, we’re finished. I have no reason to continue to concern myself with an insignificant has-been such as yourself. I have washed my hands of you and Above Average and The Story.
As for you Jonathan, well, I haven’t quite moved on just yet. You see, I have to pay you back. I took you under my wing. I mentored you and I helped you get to the level you’re at today. And how did you repay me? You betrayed me. You took advantage of me. You used me to get the Hardcore Championship. MY Hardcore Championship. And I just can’t let that slide. So Jono, in order for me to find peace and closure, I’m going to have to hurt you. Badly. But please, don’t take it TOO personally.
*Evil laugh*
Oh, and good luck tonight. You’ll need it.
King Motor-Colt V. Jonathan Michaels
Tim Hoss - Well, Jess, our next match finds two men working out some personal issues, but not with each other.
Jesse King - That's right, Gorilla, Jonathan Michaels and King Colt are going to work out some serious aggression tonight.
DOA - Foo Fighters
Michael Muffer - Ladies and gentlemen, our next match is scheduled for one fall, making his way to the ring, weighing in at 230 pounds, from Los Angeles, California, he is the WWCF Hardcore Champion, Jonathan Michaels.
Jonathan makes his way to the ring, all business.
Smoke 'Em If You Got 'Em
Muffer - And his opponent, from Adelaide, Australia, weighing in at 247 pounds, King Colt!
The lights go dark, the slow introduction to the song hits first. Alot of smoke clouds the entrance way. The lights come back on as the opening riff of the song hits when the smoke clears King Colt standing with his head down, back to the audience. King Colt then slowly raises his finger into the air. before turning around and finishing walking down to the ring, greating some fans. King Colt rolls into the ring and stands in the middle, lowering his head again and raises one finger. He then quickly pulls the cord on the cape to take it off. King Colt goes to one of the corners, again raising one finger.
The two men shake hands and the bell rings.
Michaels and Colt lock up, Colt hits a snap suplex on Michaels and quickly locks in an armbar, Michaels kicks Colt in the knee until he releases the hold.
Colt and Michaels exchange punches, Michaels hits Colt in the jaw, Colt turns from Michaels just long enough for Michaels to hit a belly to back suplex on Colt, Michaels picks Colt up and hits a sidewalk slam, Michaels covers.
1
2
Kickout.
Michaels goes to the top rope but Colt pops up and grabs Michaels by the head and hits a jaw breaker, Colt pulls Michaels up to his feet, whips him into the ropes and clotheslines him on his way back, Colt covers Michaels.
1
2
Kickout.
Colt sits Michaels up and locks in the Final Thought, Michaels struggles to escape the hold, finally pulling Colt and himself close enough to the ropes to force Colt to break the hold.
Colt and Michaels get to their feet, Colt attempts an European uppercut, but Michaels ducks it and DDT's Colt, Michaels grabs Colt's leg and applies the Key Grip.
Colt tries to roll out of the hold, but Michaels goes to the ground to increase the pressure, but Colt manages to drag himself to the ropes and Michaels is finally forced to let go.
The two men go to opposite corners to catch their breath and plan their next move.
Colt charges at Michaels, Michaels goes for the Fade to Black but Colt ducks it and hits an uppercut on Michaels, Colt runs to the rope and hits a Million Dollar Knee Lift.
Just as Michaels gets to his feet, Colt attempts a running neckbreaker, Michaels dodges Colt and hits the Fade To Black.
1
2
3
Ladies and Gentlemen, here is your winner, Jonathan Michaels!
Michaels helps Colt to his feet, but as he does, Evil M jumps into the ring, grabs Colt and hits the Journey to Hell.
Michaels attacks Evil M, but M gets to his feet and throws powder in Michaels' face and chokeslams him.
Evil M gloats as he makes his way to the back, only to be interrupted by Jonathan's shouts on the mic.
THAT'S IT, YOU PIECE OF S**T, THIS ENDS AT GOOKERMANIA, YOU WANT A PIECE OF ME SO BAD . . .
Jonathan gets to his feet.
You and me, Hardcore Title on the line, Gookermania.
Jonathan smiles.
But it's going to be in MY type of match, and you'll find out what that is. . .
Jonathan looks at his wrist, on which is not a watch.
Soon.
Evil M starts to go towards the ring, but security rushes in front of him and forces him backstage.
Jonathan helps Colt out of the ring and helps him backstage.
Gorilla, did you hear that?! Evil M V. Jonathan Michaels at GookerMania!
I sure did Jess! And for the Hardcore Championship!
But what kind of match will Jonathan Michaels choose?!
We’ll just have to wait and see. But up next, the first of our two Championship matches, as The Deadly and The Sinful challenge Two Guys Who Seriously Rock for the Tag Team Championships!
WWCF World Tag Team Championship: The Deadly and The Sinful V. Two Guys Who Seriously Rock [c]
The following tag team contest is set for one fall, with a 20 minute time limit, and it is for the WWCF World Tag Team Championships!
*Agent of Chaos*
Introducing first, the challengers. At a total combined weight of 476 pounds, Legion and Koda, The Deadly and The Sinful!
*Cherub Rock*
And their opponents. Weighing in at a combined weight of 400 pounds, Starshine and Cthulhu, Two Guys Who Seriously Rock!
Starshine enters alone.
Well, we heard over the weekend that Cthulhu had gone missing, and obviously, he still hasn’t been found!
Gorilla, without a partner, Starshine is in trouble. We could have new Champions here tonight!
As the match is about to start…
*New Blackjacks Theme*
Little Naitch starts down the aisle.
We saw LittleNaitch offer his assistance to Starshine in the wake of Cthulhu’s disappearance, and apparently, Starshine took him up on his offer!
As Naitch continues his way down the ramp, Mr. E and U.N. Owen, Seth Drakin’s men, attack Naitch from behind! With Seth and Noman watching from the ramp, the two masked men beat down Naitch until the Farris Brothers run out to chase them away. As medics come out to tend to Naitch, Seth shoves them aside, and he and Naitch begin brawling in the aisle! Several officials try to separate them, but to no avail, as Naitch and Seth fight their way to the back. Starshine, who has watched the whole thing from the ring, facepalms.
And for Starshine, it’s back to 2-on-1.
The referee calls for the bell, as Koda starts in against Starshine. The two lock up and jockey for position. Starshine tries for a clothesline, but Koda transitions behind him and applies a side headlock, which he transitions into a takedown. Starshine leg scissors out of it and charges Koda, who backbody drops the “Technical Professional”! Starshine’s back to his feet, but Koda meets him with a dropkick! Koda hit’s the ropes and as Starshine is sitting up, he catches him with a running knee to the back of the head! Cover!
1!
2!
Kickout!
Koda tags Legion in. Legion picks Starshine up by the throat and tosses him in the corner. Legion charges, but Starshine moves! Legion slams into the turnbuckle, and Starshine rolls him up!
1!
2!
Kickout!
Starshine runs the ropes, but as he comes back, he runs right into a clothesline by Legion! Legion picks Starshine up and hit’s a big boot, knocking him back down! Cover!
1!
2!
Kickout!
Legion lifts Starshine up on his shoulder and goes to drop him on the turnbuckle, but Starshine slips free and shoves Legion into the turnbuckle! As Legion backs out of the corner and turns around, Starshine hit’s the Starblind! Cover!
1!
2!
Koda breaks it up!
Koda hit’s a flurry of punches on Starshine, then sends him into the ropes! Starshine bounces back with a flying tackle, but Legion is back up and choke slam’s Starshine with one arm! Koda and Legion shoot Star into the ropes and catch him with a double hiptoss! Legion set’s Starshine up for the Fall From Grace, when the lights go out!
OK, who forgot to pay the electric bill?!
The lights come back up, and Cthulhu is in the ring, wearing a cape and mask, and holding a steel chair wrapped in barbed wire!
What the-??!!!
Legion drops Starshine and charges at Cthulhu, who levels him with the chair! The bell rings, as Cthulhu swings again, this time knocking Koda to the mat! Cthulhu swings the chair around wildly, almost hitting Starshine in the process!
Ladies and gentlemen, your winners, as the result of a disqualification, The Deadly and The Sinful!
Starshine grabs his title belt, as Cthulhu air guitar’s.
Who was that masked man, Gorilla?!
I think we both know exactly who it was, Jess. And lucky for Starshine he showed when he did, or Legion and Koda would be the Tag Team Champions right now!
I don’t know who you think it is, but I don’t have a clue! Who was it?!
…. Moving on, our main event is coming up next, a rematch of sorts from Rumble in the Jungle. Above Average defends the Inter-Forum Championship against M.O.P.!
Well, once again I see WWCF are screwing around with me. After the disgusting lack of respect afforded to me last week by having me defend my Inter Forum Championship against MOP and Aaron Enigma, instead of the man I had selected to face on the PPV, I really did think they would respect my wishes this time around. But alas, WWCF management don't seem to have the intellect to understand how to keep someone other than their "favourite sons" happy around here.
Tonight, WWCF management have chosen to make me defend my title against M.O.P. But before I get to that, I'd like to say once again to everybody, I told you so. I told you that I am the greatest wrestler in this company, and 7 days ago I proved it. I won two matches. First of all I retained my belt against the aforementioned two wrestlers, and pinned Enigma to do so. And now as per his own preset stipulation I am apparently responsible for sending Aaron Enigma out of the Story. Aaron, when Motor-Colt, Evil M and I offered you the olive branch to be a part of the greatest stable in the history of professional wrestling, I expected better from you. When we picked you up you were one of the hottest prospects in the business. No doubt you have talent even to this day. You have improved during your time with us. But it is clear that we wasted our precious time on giving you an invaluable education. Just because you lost to me, something that, in case you hadn't noticed Aaron, people have been doing for the better part of a year now, you took your ball and went home.
Well boo hoo Aaron. Boo hoo! When you put that ridiculous stipulation in place to begin with I knew you were no longer in the right frame of mind to be with Colt and I. I knew I had to remove you from the elite of WWCF in the Story, and I did just that. Aaron, you may well be one of the top up and coming stars even still, but when you leave the Story you leave the big time pal. It's such a shame, because with my assistance you really could have been something special. Something top tier. A main eventer. Such a shame... but I'm not going to waste any more time with you.
There was more to Monday night. I defeated pretty much everyone worth their salt in this business in one match to become the #1 contender for the World Heavyweight title. WWCF you may think this makes those contract renegotiations easier, because why would I want to give up my main event spotlight? The main event spotlight I might add that is long overdue. You can't buy me that easily. I am the #1 contender IN SPITE OF YOU! I earned this title shot, and I will take it with both hands, and I will become the champion in just 21 days on the grandest stage of them all, Gookermania.
But I can't lose my focus on the here and the now. Tonight I do battle with M.O.P. again for the Inter Forum title. I've been on top of the mountain for 315 days. That's 45 weeks. 7 weeks and 1.25 days away from one year. I've beaten everyone. Yada yada yada. I've said it all before, and there is no question I will be saying it all again next week when I defeat whatever poor sap happens to be next. M.O.P. you have a second chance tonight to do what you failed to do last week. You're a fantastic wrestler, without question, but you're facing the best in the world today. At Gookermania I aim to be the first man to simultaneously hold the World and Inter Forum titles, and it'll take on hell of an effort to prevent me from achieving my target. M.O.P. if you can beat me I will happily... well, not happily, but I will shake your hand right in the middle of that ring and show the masses that you are a top drawer competitor. But M.O.P. I sincerely doubt I need to use any hand lotion today, for that will not happen. In case it wasn't obvious by my monicker, I am Above Average, and I will beat you.
Inter-Forum Championship: M.O.P. V. Above Average [c]
The following contest is set for one fall, and has a 20 minute time limit. And it is for the Inter-Forum Championship!
*Painkiller*
Making his way to the ring first, representing WWCF Corporate. Coming in at 6 foot 1 and 232 pounds and hailing from Bergen County, New Jersey. M. O. P.!
M.O.P. comes out to mostly boos with a few scattered cheers here and there.
At Rumble in the Jungle, M.O.P. was not successful in either of his attempts to win the Rumble or the Inter-Forum Championship!
But M.O.P also never lost his title match! He demanded a one-on-one rematch and it was granted.
While he does have a point, I can't help but feel that he pulled some strings to get it, especially after it was revealed by Aaron Enigma that he wasn't the traitor to Corporate!
*Poison*
And, representing The Story! Coming in at 6 foot 6 and 260 lbs and haling from Belfast, Northern Ireland. He is the Inter-Forum Champion! Above Average!
Above Average makes his way to the ring to loud cheers.
There's the man of the hour! Not only retaining his title at the Rumble, but also winning the Guerrilla Rumble match, making him the Number One Contender to Jazzman's WWCF Championship at Gookermania!
I'm sorry, 'Rilla. I couldn't hear you talk with your lips on Above Average's buttcheeks!
Give it a rest, King! It's hard to deny Above Average's accomplishments at the Rumble. He's the MVP of the WWCF right now, and his career can only go up!
The referee holds the Inter-Forum Championship up high as the bell rings. M.O.P. and Above Average circle around the ring before locking up. A series of holds and reversals takes place. First M.O.P. gets a hammerlock, which Above Average reverses into an armlock. M.O.P. then reverses it into a side headlock, taking the Inter-Forum Champion to his knees. But Above Average powers out of it and flips M.O.P. over, going for a quick pin attempt.
1!
2!
M.O.P's able to kick out just after the referree counts two. Above Average picks him up by the head and Irish Whips him into the ropes, but M.O.P. ducks as Double A goes for a clothesline. He rebounds and hits the champion with a lariat, then goes for a pin.
1!
2!
Above Average kicks out at 2. M.O.P. gets up and stomps on Above Average's prone body a few times before climbing up the turnbuckles. But as he leaps for the Double Elbow Drop, Above Average rolls out of the way! M.O.P. lands hard on the mat and Above Average uses it to his advantage. He stomps on M.O.P. and then picks him up for a sit-out powerbomb. He goes for the cover.
1!
2!
M.O.P. just kicks out at 2 1/2! He picks up M.O.P. and lifts him up in the air for a delayed vertical suplex. After a couple of seconds, M.O.P. is able to drop out of the vertical position and lands on his feet behind the Inter-Forum Champion. He grabs Above Average and hits him with a vicious German Suplex. He holds on to the champion and delivers another German Suplex.
It looks like M.O.P. is going for a trio of German Suplexes here, folks!
His knees are getting weak, though. Doing something like this to a man of Above Average's stature is no easy task!
You're right, Jesse. Above Average has a good five inches on his challenger. This isn't easy for a man of M.O.P's stature.
Showing signs of weariness, M.O.P. still manages to complete the hat trick and deliver yet another German Suplex. He goes for the cover, almost collapsing on top of Above Average.
1!
2!
The Inter-Forum Champion kicks out just as the referee's hand was coming down for three! M.O.P. wipes the sweat off his forehead, taking a small breather. He then puts Double A's arm in a chickenwing position and puts his other arm around his neck as a sleeperhold. He hooks his leg around Above Average's own and applies pressure.
I've never seen M.O.P. use a submission maneuver like this before!
He calls it the Jersey Jughandle, King. Apparently he made over 50 people submit to it before coming to the WWCF! That he's bringing it out of retirement for this match shows just how serious M.O.P. is! Will Above Average tap?!
The champion struggles, but is able to inch his way to the ropes bit by bit. As he reaches the edge of the ring, M.O.P. tries to drag Above Average back towards the center, but not before he gets a firm grasp of the bottom rope. The referee tells the challenger to break the hold, but he refuses, defiantly shouting "I've got til five, ref!" He begins to count.
"1!"
"2!"
"3!"
"4!"
M.O.P. finally lets go just after the ref counts to four. He gets up, taking Above Average with him. He smacks him across the chest a couple of times with the Knife Edge Chop, each time the crowd going "WOOOOOOO!" as he makes contact. After the third one, Above Average grabs his chopping arm and hits him with a European Uppercut! He then hits M.O.P. hard with a Superkick! After a second of staggering, M.O.P. falls down on his back, motionless.
It's all over, King!
Looks like M.O.P. won't be delivering on his promise to take away the inter--wait what's this?
Above Average falls to his knees, breathing hard. He can barely muster out the energy to cover his opponent!
It looks like that Superkick took a lot of energy out of the Inter-Forum Champion, too.
Seeing both men not really moving. The referee begins a 10-count.
"1!"
"2!"
"3!"
"4!"
"5!"
"6!"
Finally, Above Average gets on his hands and knees and crawls over to where M.O.P. is lying. He makes the cover.
1!
2!
M.O.P. lifts his shoulder just as the ref's hand was about to hit the mat for three!
Bah gawd! What an amazing main event we're having, King!
These men are taking themselves to their absolute limits! I'm amazed that M.O.P. was able to get his shoulder up!
Above Average argues with the ref, saying that he should have won the match. The referee doesn't budge, but M.O.P. trips him from the ground and attempts a roll-up from behind, grabbing the tights!
1!
2!
Above Average gets out of it right after 2. He's able to get to his feet before M.O.P. does and stomps the challenger a few times out of frustration. He picks him up and Irish Whips him into the corner. As he runs into the corner with a knee lift, the challenger counters by sticking his foot out, hitting the champion in the face with it. Staggering, M.O.P. lifts him up in the fireman's carry position and slams him down hard with a Corporate Driver!
That's it! We have a new champion!
M.O.P. takes a bit to recover from his own execution of the move. After a few seconds, he goes for the cover.
1!
2!
Above Average JUST kicks out!
Both of these men have kicked out of each other's signature moves!
What a main event! A real slobberknocker!
M.O.P., after recovering a bit of stamina, goes up to the top rope and delivers a double elbow drop. This time, the move connects and M.O.P. immediately goes for a pin.
1!
2!
Above Average kicks out again!
That had to be 2 and 19/20th's!
M.O.P. slams his hands on the mat in frustration. He picks up Above Average, looking to set him up for another Corporate Driver, but Above Average gets the upper hand and hits him with a Discus Punch, sending the challenger to rest against the ropes. He smacks him in the head a couple of times for good measure, and then Irish Whips him to the other side of the ring. He attempts to Superkick M.O.P. again, this time looking to make sure to put him away for good, but M.O.P. ducks! Recovering, M.O.P. takes advantage of his opponent's off-balance state and picks him up again in a fireman's carry position. He does another Corporate Driver, slamming down the Inter-Forum Champion into the mat with even more force than last time. He makes no hesitations this time, and goes for the cover.
1!
2!
3!
The referee calls for the bell!
Your winner and the NEW Inter-Forum Champion, M. O. P.!!!
I can't believe it. Tim! We have a new champion!
I can't say M.O.P. didn't earn it. But if you ask me, both these men looked like champions tonight, and if Above Average can perform like that at Gookermania, he may very well walk out the WWCF World Champion!
After the match, Above Average gets up and grabs the Inter-Forum Championship Belt. He looks at the belt and then at the new champion. He then hands the belt to M.O.P. and offers a handshake.
After a couple seconds' hesitation, M.O.P. accepts both the belt and the handshake. Above Average is the one to raise the new champion's hand in victory.
What an amazing display of sportsmanship from the former champion!
M.O.P. takes to the top turnbuckle and raises his new championship belt up high with his left arm, pointing to it and himself with his right arm.
*Smoke ‘Em If You Got ‘Em*
King Motor-Colt walks to the ring, applauding both men. He enters and offers AA a handshake, which AA reluctantly accepts. He offers one to M.O.P., but M.O.P. simply stares at the hand. Colt and M.O.P. get face to face, as AA looks on, watching both men carefully, as we fade to black.
Credits: Jazzman, The Boiler Room Brawler, The General of the Monkey Army, Evil M, Aaron Enigma, Whitey Fats, “Evil La Parka”, Jonathan Michaels, Above Average, and M.O.P.
