Monday Niteraw - February 1, 2010

Monday NiteRaw February 1, 2010

Jesse King - Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Monday NiteRaw! I’m Jesse King!

Tim Hoss - And I’m Gorilla Tim Hoss.

Jesse King - We are one week removed from King of WrestleCrap!

Tim Hoss - Last Monday, we saw the landscape change drastically. We saw Jonathan Michaels defeat the CEO Seth Drakin to save the WWCF Hardcore Championship!

Jesse King - In addition, it was one of the most shocking swerves ever! Evil M and Yellow Jacket, who we THOUGHT were bitter enemies, actually in cahoots all along!

Tim Hoss - Also, we have a new WWCF Inter-Forum Champion, as “Damn Right” Jackson defeated M.O.P. to capture the title!

Jesse King - And we now know one half of the Ernest Goes to Wargames main event!

Tim Hoss - In the finals of the King of WrestleCrap tournament, Viva Los Bio Dome defeated Square and Little Naitch to become the 2010 King of WrestleCrap!

Jesse King - And in the main event, Aaron Enigma defeated Jazzman to capture the WWCF World Heavyweight Championship!

Tim Hoss - And we are going to here from the new World Champion right now!


*A big pyro goes off as Make a Move starts playing. Aaron Enigma bursts onto the entrance ramp holding his title and the crowd goes nuts.*

Michael Muffer - Please welcome the NEW WWCF World Heavyweight Champion... AARON ENIGMA!!!

*Aaron gets into the ring and circles around, pointing to all the fans. After a minute or so of cheers, he quiets the crowd and begins to speak*

Aaron Enigma: How great it is to stand here before each and every one of you fans as the NEW WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION!

*More cheers*

Aaron Enigma: Now, people have been asking me all sorts of questions. I'll start with the first one. How does it feel to get your first title in WWCF? Honestly, one of the best feelings of my life. To know that my patience has finally been rewarded is great. Second question: How does it feel to know you beat possibly the greatest Heavyweight champion in history? Well, it feels pretty amazing, but I can't sell Jazzman short. We took each other to the limit. At the end of the match I was one step ahead of him and took advantage of it. He's a competitor though and it probably won't be long before he's back in the main event contending for the title. The third question: What do you think of Viva? Well see, me and Viva go way back. We debuted around the same time, but he was a winner, and I was a loser. I noticed this, and changed my game up. Then I got into Wargames, and people have loved me ever since then.

The thing about Viva is, you can never count this man out. He is without a doubt the most unpredictable man in WWCF today. We have so much in common when it comes to fighting style and in-ring psychology. I dare say we're probably equal in terms of every wrestling stat you could think of. When we collide at Ernest Goes To Wargames for my title, it's gonna be the battle of the century. However, when the time comes, I don't plan on losing this belt.

Now.....

*Paparazzi hits, and "Hollywood King" Viva Los Bio Dome steps on the ramp, in his cape and crown. The red carpet is rolled out, the Paparazzi is shooting his picture like crazy, and he makes his way to the ring. He steps over the middle rope, walks towards the announcers, calls for a microphone, and begins speaking.*


"Hollywood King" Viva Los Bio Dome: All shall rise when the King addresses his court. I see that Aaron Enigma is making a concerted effort not to sell the King short, which is an intelligent move on the part of the new WWCF Champion. It is in stark contrast of what took place earlier this week, when he is quoted as saying the following. The King requests that footage be rolled at this time.

*The production truck instantly rolls the tape, and the following quote is aired.*

Aaron Enigma: You and me started out around the same time. You became the first ever Heatz champion. I thrust myself into the main event. I passed up the titles, in favor of putting myself in a position to win this belt I carry now. We struggled to climb the ladder yet here we are again. You and me, squaring off for my title. However, I can't put all my focus on you just yet.


"Hollywood King" Viva Los Bio Dome: To suggest that there was ever a time in which you will not focus completely on the King of Wrestlecrap is not only a slap in the face of the King, but a disgraceful showing of disrespect by the new champion. A champion who prides himself on being an honorable and fair individual.

*"Hollywood King" Viva Los Bio Dome removes his crown.*

"Hollywood King" Viva Los Bio Dome: Not to mention, buddy, it's a REALLY f***ing dumb way to go about your business. The "Inter-Forum" champion, a guy I beat two f***in' weeks ago, should NOT be of your concern. Not now, not ever. I don't mean to toot my own horn, but the last month, which shall now also known as the King's rise to power, all started because of stupid people like you, Aaron. People like Seth Drakin, Square, "Damn Right" Jackass continually selling me short. Despite me being the hottest commodity in wrestling today, and a man riding a hot streak like you would not believe, I still do not command the respect I seek.

So what do you think is going to come of that? What happened to Ganzo bomb, who's injuries he sustained in his match with me lead him to be future endeavored? What happened to that "Old Yeller" Stryker? I put his ass out of wrestling for good after I decided he was using me to return to his former glory days. Point blank, Aaron. I. END. CAREERS. Unfortunately for you, yours is on the chopping block, and I'm not going to command your focus?

Don't let the title win go to your head. After all, you beat a geriatric jazz connoisseur who smells like farts. To suggest that the Belt wasn't crawling away from his stinky ass is a horrible lack of foresight. You were nothing more than a lucky guy at the right place at the right time.

I like you Aaron. You're a good guy. It's just a shame that you're going to be a transitional champion. A foot note in the history of the WWCF Championship Title. I just want to make one thing clear. It's NOT your fault. There's no way you could have ever seen me, no longer the fastest rising star, but now THE STAR of this company, impatiently nipping at your heels.

You could do all the detective work in the world, and you still won't be able to figure out when a Purple Sticky Punch is coming at you. Despite your confidence, my fighting style and tactics will have you on your toes for the bitter end. You can only cover your eyes, protect your junk, and run away from me for so long.

Oh, by the way, good luck in your match tonight. I sure as hell didn't need it to beat him.

*Paparazzi hits and "Hollywood King" Viva Los Bio Dome drops down to one knee, takes a mental picture of Aaron, and exits. The camera pans to Aaron, who looks pissed.*

*Paparazzi hits and "Hollywood King" Viva Los Bio Dome drops down to one knee, takes a mental picture of Aaron, and exits. The camera pans to Aaron, who looks pissed.*

"Gorilla" Tim Hoss: If I were "Damn Right" Jackson, I'd sure be apprehensive now. I'm sure he had no idea that "King" Viva was going to poke the cage and wake the beast! We'll be right back


*Commercial Break:
Kit Kat
JC Penny
Ocean Spray*


Jesse King - We're back and before the break, we heard from the new World Champion Aaron Enigma and the 2010 King of WrestleCrap Viva Los Bio Dome! We'll see both again later tonight, but right now, let's get back to Ernest Goes To Wargames!

Tim Hoss - So we have one half of the main event. We know the other half will be the big Wargames match, featuring The Sam’s team taking on Seth Drakin’s team.

Jesse King - The Sam has already announced himself as the first member of his team. Who else will join him? Well, hopefully that question will be answered…

Right now!


(“No More Mr Nice Guy” – Alice Cooper)
Michael Muffer – Ladies and Gentlemen, it is my honor to introduce to you. The Return of the Manager of Champions. The Sam!!!
(The Sam walks through the curtain wearing a suit with his arms spread out. The Sam sings along to his new theme music as the fans give The Sam a standing ovation. The Sam walks down the ramp high fiving and shaking the hands of the fans along the way. The Sam makes his way around the ringside area shaking everyone’s hand. The Sam starts walking up the steps but stops to look at the fans. The fans start a “Welcome Home” chant. The Sam enters the ring and taunts each side of the ring.
The music stops and the fans continue their ovation. They clap so long the show is forced to go into its first ad break.)


*Commercials*
Quiznos
General Motors
The Gabbo show


We return to see the fans still applauding. The fans eventually quiet down as The Sam grabs the microphone with tears welling in his eyes.
The Sam – Thankyou for that.
The fans cheer some more but The Sam gestures them to keep quiet.
The Sam – we have a long night ahead.
First off, it’s great to be back here. You know, when I signed that deal with WWCF last week, I could tell that none f the upper management were happy about it. Because the upper management don’t want me here. However, there are 3 reasons why I am here. First off, you fans. You fans wrote letters ad emails and petitions demanding the Manager of Champions be allowed back in WWCF, and for that, thankyou.
Secondly, the boys in the back. Not all of them. But some of them helped me out and to them I say thankyou.
And thirdly, and probably the key factor. My good friend, Littlenaitch. But more about him later.

Now people have been asking “Well now that The Sam is back, how long before he puts his tail between his legs and decides to crawl back to WWCF officials?” And I will make it clear right now, and you can put this on record. I will NEVER crawl back to those a**holes. Because I’m not here for the Board of Directors, I’m not here for Commissioner Morton, I’m not here for the stockholders, I’m not here for D-Day Dave and I am especially not here for the biggest a**hole of them all, Seth Drakin. I am here for you fans. I am here to make sure you fans get the best out of this product and that you fans don’t get screwed over with “sports entertainment”. Because I know you paid to see “wrestling”.

Now lets talk about War games. If you pay attention my blogs you will notice that I have myself the first member of my team. Now this may seem crazy, because it is. I may not be a wrestler. But I do know how to kick ass. But it seems Seth Drakin has refused to be involved in this match. I guess he is afraid of what I will do to him. But no matter. Because as you would know I am not alone. As I said last week, I will announce my 2nd partner here tonight. And ladies and gentlemen, may I introduce to you. The 2nd team member of The Sam Family and former World Heavyweight champion, LITTLENAITCH!

Everyone turns to the curtain to see Naitch, but instead we see Commissioner Jessica Morton. She comes down to the ring as fans boo

The Sam - …Your looking nice tonight Naitch.
Jessica – First off, welcome back Sam. I would say it is an honor but I don’t want to be branded a liar.
The Sam – Don’t worry, I’m sure you’ve been branded other names.
Jessica – Well at any rate. I just want to inform you that Mr Drakin has asked me to tell you that he doesn’t care who is on your team. Because he will, and I quote, “crush you into a fine powder”.
The Sam – Well, since Seth is too chicken to face me at the PPV or here tonight. How about you pass this message onto him. To quote a great man, “I came here to kick ass and chew gum. And I’m all out of gum”.
(Suddenly, a masked man runs through the crowd and slides into the ring and attacks The Sam with a steel chair. The masked man stands over The Sam and takes off his mask revealing…. SETH DRAKIN!
Seth grabs the microphone and tells an unconscious and bloody Sam.
Seth – Who is chicken now?
(Seth and Jessica leave the ring and head back as paramedics and Littlenaitch run out to make sure The Sam is still breathing.)


*Commercial Break:
Taco Bell
Net Flicks
Toyota*


Tim Hoss - Ladies and gentlemen, we want to apologize for the graphic images we saw just before the commercial break.

Jesse King - We certainly hope The Sam is OK, but we must get on with the show. To Michael Muffer and our opening contest!


The Fishmonger V. Mr. Quintana Roo

Michael Muffer: “The following contest is scheduled for one fall, with a 15-minute time limit.”

"Strike a pose"

Muffer: “Introducing first, from Your Wildest Dreams, weighing in at 215 lbs, Mr. Quintana Roo!”

"Vogue" by Madonna plays as Mr. Quintana Roo walks through the curtain followed by Leon Sharpe. Roo occasionally stops and gets photographed by Sharpe. Roo rolls into the ring.

As Mr. Quintana Roo is posing, the lights go out and “The Salmon Dance” blasts over the PA. Out comes The Fishmonger, pretending to cast off a fishing line into the crowd, then reels them in.

Muffer: “And his opponent, from Brighton England and fighting out of Cape Cod, Massachusetts, weighing in at 210 lbs, The Fishmonger!”

The Fishmonger darts to the ring, but stops at ringside. He stares at Mr. Quintana Roo, who looks disgusted. Monger drops his hook and rope, then starts to swim around ringside. He swims by Leon Sharpe, he stomps on and him and tosses him into the ring. Afterwards, he wipes his hands and acts disgusted.

The bell rings, signaling the beginning of the match. Roo darts at Fishmonger and starts stomping on him. Referee “Spud” Verne Johnson counts to four, then tries his best to push Quintana away. He yells at him, but Roo has no idea what he’s saying. Roo brushes him off and picks The Fishmonger up. He sets up for a suplex, but pushes him away. He wipes his nose, signaling that the Fishmonger stinks.

King: “I heard that Mr. Quintana Roo hates the smell of fish.”

Hoss: “How would you know that?”

King: “Leon Sharpe told me, of course!”

Roo starts yelling at the ref, distracting him. With the distraction, Leon Sharpe grabs The Fishmonger’s rope. Seeing this, Monger goes to get Sharpe, who sprays him with cologne.

Hoss: “What the hell was that all about? He didn’t even spray him in the eyes.”

King: “He sprayed him with cologne. He’s trying to get the fish stench off.”

Roo skips past Spud and attacks Fishmonger from behind. He clubs him in the back of the head, and then starts pounding on him. He moves away after a few punches, then starts yelling at Sharpe, signaling that the Fishmonger still smells.

King: “It seems as if the cologne didn’t work.”

Hoss: “Aw, that’s too bad.”

King: “Do I sense a hint of sarcasm?”

Hoss: “Possibly.”

Distraught, Roo turns his attention back to The Fishmonger. He is met by a huge punch, sending him stumbling backwards. Monger comes at him with more punches. He then pretends to cast off a fishing rod turning into another punch, this one knocking Roo down. He locks an armbar on him, but Quintana quickly breaks it up and rolls outside. Once again, he signals that The Fishmonger smells. Sharpe runs over to him, engaging him in a pep talk. Shortly, Mr. Quintana Roo reluctantly gets back into the ring.

With a huge grin on his face, The Fishmonger challenges Mr. Quintana Roo to a test of strength. Looking disgusted, Roo shakes his head no. The Fishmonger shrugs his shoulders, then charges at Roo. Quintana ducks and backdrops him over the top rope, but Monger lands on the apron. He flips Roo around and punches him in the face.

He gets back into the ring and applies a full nelson. Roo starts flailing around, trying to find a way out of the hold. Eventually, he rams Monger backfirst into the turnbuckle. He releases the hold, as Roo starts delivering back elbows to his forehead. He then hits an arm drag, hurling him halfway across the ring. He hit’s a huge dropkick and goes for a pin.

One, Two…

Kick out!

Hoss: “Quintana Roo didn’t hook the leg, which gave The Fishmonger an easy escape.”

King: “That’s because he hates the smell of fish. He wants to get the pinfall done over as quick as possible. Also, it’s MR. Quintana Roo to you!”

Mr. Quintana Roo once again looks disgusted, with Sharpe yelling objectives at him. Roo backs up and waits for The Fishmonger to get to his feet so he doesn’t have to smell him. Once he does reach his feet, Roo charges at him and hit’s a clothesline. He starts stomping on him, then applies a boston crab. After about ten seconds, he releases the hold, once again signaling that he hates the smell.

Hoss: “Why did he release the hold?!?”

King: “Because he hates the smell of fish. Get with the picture.”

Hoss: “You don’t cost yourself the match because you don’t like your opponent’s stench.”

King: “Says the man who’s sitting behind a desk watching the match.”

Angrily, Sharpe starts yelling at Roo, barking out orders. Roo seems to be arguing with him, until he once again begrudgingly turns his attention back to The Fishmonger. He is met with a short-armed clothesline. He picks him up and hit’s a vertical suplex. He picks him up and hits another one. He picks him up again, this time transitioning it into a fisherman’s suplex. He gets the pin.

One, Two, T…

Kick out!

The Fishmonger picks Roo up and goes to irish whip him into the ropes. Roo reverses this into his own irish whip and connects with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker on Monger’s return. He goes for the cover.

One, Two, Th…

Kick out!

Hoss: “Once again, he doesn’t hook the leg.”

King: “How many times do I have to tell you he hates the smell of fish?”

Hoss: “How many times do I have to tell you that you don’t let a stupid hatred ruin your chances of winning a match?”

King: “Too many times.”

Mr. Quintana Roo once again walks away, waiting for The Fishmonger to get up. Leon Sharpe yells at him, in which Roo then walks toward his opponent.

Hoss: “I guess Sharpe told him to stay on his opponent.”

Roo picks him up and hit’s a backbreaker. He goes for the cover.

One, Two, T…

Kick out!

Hoss: “Once again, he doe…”

King: “Yeah, yeah, yeah. He doesn’t hook the leg. We got it!”

Frustrated, Roo starts throwing a fit. Verne Johnson has none of this and confronts Roo. With the argument taking place, Leon Sharpe sneaks into the ring and clocks The Fishmonger over the head with it. He scurries out of the ring. Roo moves the ref out of the way and goes up top. He hit’s The Photo Opportunity on a prone Fishmonger. He gets the pin cover.

One, Two, Three!

Muffer: “Here is your winner, Mr. Quintana Roo!”

Hoss: “We just seen a case of highway robbery. Thanks to Leon Sharpe, Quintana Roo stole a victory tonight.

King: “And he didn’t hook the leg. Proving you wrong, Tim. Also, as a said before, it’s MR. Quintana Roo to you!”

Leon Sharpe enters the ring and raises Mr. Quintana Roo’s hand in victory. He then tosses him the “walking stick” and then gives him an order. Roo walks over to the prone Fishmonger and starts whacking him with the stick, as Sharpe laughs maniacally.

Hoss: “What the hell is this all about?!?”

King: “As Teddy Roosevelt said, “Walk softly and carry a big stick”.”

Hoss: “He never said to hit a man with the stick!”

King: “Mr. Quintana Roo is improvising.”

Leon Sharpe takes a picture, whilst yelling out “Future champion!”


*Commercial Break:
Papa Johns
Volvo
Nintendo Wii*


Handicap Match: Jonathan Michaels and M.O.P. V. The Boiler Room Brawler

Gorilla Tim Hoss: And we're back with our next match up. It is an aftermath, it is a reckoning, for the events of King of Wrestlecrap.

Jesse King: Michaels successfully defended the Hardcore Championship, and his fellow Equalizer M.O.P. lost the Inter-Forum Championship to that no-good DR Jackson, all thanks to my man BRB.

Gorilla Tim Hoss: That's right King. Last Monday, M.O.P. ...

*Video package rolls of M.O.P. going for a pin on DR Jackson and being surprised by an explosion, to which DR Jackson pins him.*

Gorilla Tim Hoss: ... lost the Inter-Forum Championship to DR Jackson when the Boiler Room Brawler used his pyrokinetic powers to confuse M.O.P. long enough to allow DR Jackson the win.

Jesse King: But I can't help but question if BRB actually did it. He claims that it had nothing to do with him. He hates DR Jackson about as much as I do. And I really, really, don't like DR Jackson.

Gorilla Tim Hoss: On www.wwcf.com there is speculation on the forums that it could be the Man in Black, as he has exhibited strange, black magical powers before.

Jesse King: And if a certain World Champion would crack that case, hopefully over the head, the Inter-Forum Championship will be at peace, well, DR Jackson notwithstanding.

Michael Muffer: Our next match of the evening, scheduled for one fall, is a Handicap Match.

*"Days of the Phoenix" by AFI hits the speakers to cheers as M.O.P. enters the ring with a scowl on his face.*

Michael Muffer: Our first contestant, now entering the ring weighing in at 232lbs. Hailing from Bergen County, NJ: M... O... P!

Gorilla Tim Hoss: M.O.P. feels betrayed, Jesse. He allied with the Boiler Room Brawler and it cost him his Inter-Forum Championship.

*M.O.P. enters the ring without greeting the fans.*

Jesse King: But who says that it's BRB's fault?

Gorilla Tim Hoss: BRB is well known for using his ability to summon explosive fire at will, Jesse. Look at TTS being kicked out of the Corporation, his match against Aaron Enigma at Gookermania, his match against The General of the Monkey Army at In Your Apartment, the list goes on.

Jesse King: But what about Evil M?

Michael Muffer: And his partner...

*DOA hits the speakers.*

Crowd: You Saved Hard Core! (clap-clap-clapclapclap)

*Michaels soaks it up at the entrance stage.*

Gorilla Tim Hoss: And here is a man of the hour, King! Jonathan Michaels saved the Hardcore Championship from Seth Drakin last Monday, and Boiler Room Brawler will have to defend it against him.

Jesse King: But not this week. This week looks like a pinata match, Gorilla. They're going to beat BRB to a pulp. BRB + Equalizers = a mess as history currently goes.

Jerry Fish: Weighing in at 240lbs and hailing from Los Angeles, CA... Jonathan... Michaels!

*Michaels walks down the ramp, high-fiving fans as he goes along.*

Gorilla Tim Hoss: It does seem like that, Jesse. I'm not sure if I can remember a time when he wasn't involved with one of the three except for the very beginning.

Michael Muffer: And their opponent...

*Michaels enters the ring as "You Asked For It" by Mercyful Fate hits the speakers and the Boiler Room Brawler enters the arena to a storm of boos.*

Jesse King: Hey, don't boo him! He won that Hardcore Championship fair and square! Hasn't anyone ever heard of "innocent until proven guilty?"

Gorilla Tim Hoss: I think that they want the Boiler Room Brawler to bleed tonight. He is getting some major heat for what he did-

Jesse King: They think he did.

Gorilla Tim Hoss: In any case, for what happened to M.O.P.

Michael Muffer: Weighing in at 350lbs... and hailing from Rockford, IL. Your World Wrestlecrap Federation Hardcore Champion: Boiler... Room... Brawler!

*Boiler Room Brawler brandishes the Hardcore Championship.*

Crowd: That's Not Your Belt!

*Boiler Room Brawler scowls and makes his way to the ring.*

Jesse King: Oh stop it!

Gorilla Tim Hoss: If the Boiler Room Brawler really is innocent, then I think that time will heal these wounds.

*Boiler Room Brawler enters the ring, wary of M.O.P. and Michaels, who give him berth.

Referee John Creed gets the two sides into their corners.*

Jesse King: This match is patently unfair, TH. The Boiler Room Brawler has to take on two men tonight! He's one tough son of a bitch, and I think that if he plays his cards right that he can do it.

Gorilla Tim Hoss: If he plays his cards right he'll make it out of here alive.

*Referee John Creed allows the match to start. Michaels lets M.O.P. start first.

M.O.P. continues to scowl at BRB, who looks at M.O.P. with consternation.*

Jesse King: I don't see what pinning their opponent's shoulders to the mat is going to solve this situation, TH.

*BRB and M.O.P. converge into the center. M.O.P. winds up and punches BRB in the face. BRB backs up, winds up, and goes for a chop, but M.O.P. side-steps him.*

Gorilla Tim Hoss: As always, it is best to avoid getting hit by the Boiler Room Brawler whenever possible.

Jesse King: Tell me about it, Gorilla. One move from BRB can knock the wind out of you. Few wrestlers on the roster can match his sheer power.

Gorilla Tim Hoss: DR Jackson comes to mind. Evil M if I say so myself. But you're otherwise right.

*M.O.P. snap kicks BRB in the belly after his side-step.*

Jesse King: And BRB is a tank. Few moves can truly put him away without a lot of work.

*M.O.P. quickly backs up, twists around and back kicks BRB in the belly.*

Gorilla Tim Hoss: That's why wrestlers are well-advised to keep a constant assault on BRB. Furthermore, wearing him out is a common tactic.

Jesse King: But questionable. BRB rarely loses to submission. Pinfall neither, but still.

*M.O.P. leaps into the air and dropkicks BRB square in the chest, knocking him to the ropes. BRB rebounds and lumbers towards M.O.P., who rolls out of the way as BRB attempts to drop an elbow into his chest.*

Gorilla Tim Hoss: M.O.P. is a skilled enough grappler to take on BRB by himself I think.

Jesse King: Bull, Gorilla! The one and only time that they met, BRB had M.O.P. on that mat, finished! The Man in Black, the real problem, stopped BRB from gaining the Inter-Forum Championship that Monday.

*M.O.P. leaps to his feet as BRB runs for him, to which he locks his legs around BRB's leg and drop toe holds him to the mat, slamming BRB's face hard in the process. BRB rolls into a sitting position to cover his nose.*

Gorilla Tim Hoss: That match was a long time coming, Jesse, and it still has yet to resolve.

*M.O.P. scornfully looks down at BRB and tags in Michaels. Michaels waits for BRB to get up, which only takes a couple of seconds. BRB runs at Michaels, lunging his arm out for a lariat, but Michaels ducks, turns around, leaps into the air, and drop kicks BRB to the ropes. BRB rebounds, and Michaels catches him, locking his arms around his neck and head and slamming him backfirst into the mat.*

Jesse King: Is BRB even trying tonight?

Gorilla Tim Hoss: BRB is more methodical than he looks. He's smarter than the average hoss.

Jesse King: But he's getting almost no attacks in. His heart doesn't appear to be in this.

*Michaels goes for the pin.

Referee John Creed counts 1... 2... and BRB kicks out.*

Gorilla Tim Hoss: A two-count does seem too early, there is an air of discouragement tonight.

*BRB shoves Michaels off of him.*

Jesse King: Here we go!

*BRB grapples with Michaels and Irish whips him to the outside.*

Gorilla Tim Hoss: Michaels has been tossed out!

*BRB crosses the ropes and rummages below the ring, grabbing a chair.*

Jesse King: This isn't a Hardcore Match!

*Michaels gets up and heads for BRB, who slams the chair over his head, then swings upward, knocking him back and onto his back.*

Jesse King: No!

*Referee John Creed calls the bell as BRB yanks a mic. The crowd boos BRB.*

Michael Muffer: Here are your winners by disqualification: M.O.P. and Jonathan... Michaels!

Boiler Room Brawler: This match is crap! I don't have to stand for it! M.O.P., I give you my word that I didn't make you lose at King of Wrestlecrap. And Michaels, our beef ends next week when I crush you. I may have wanted that Inter-Forum Championship, but I'm sure as hell going to show all of you here and all of you at home, just what kind of Hardcore Champion I can be, one big, massive, pipe wrench swing at a time!

*BRB drops the mic and leaves the arena as the crowd continues booing and M.O.P. helps Michaels up, as he's in a confused daze.*

Jesse King: Why are they booing him, Gorilla?

Gorilla Tim Hoss: Because sometimes a pinfall is not enough. Sometimes the fans deserve more. Sometimes the fans deserve to have their faith rewarded.

Jesse King: But why is he taking the heat?

Gorilla Tim Hoss: Because they choose to boo him.

Jesse King: He didn't do anything wrong.

Gorilla Tim Hoss: Because he's the Hardcore Champion the WWCF deserves, but not the one it needs right now.

Jesse King: ... ?

Gorilla Tim Hoss: So they'll boo him, because he can take it.

Jesse King: ... ?

Gorilla Tim Hoss: Because he's not our World Champion. He's a silent guardian, a watchful protector. A Hardcore Champion.

Jesse King: ... ?

Gorilla Tim Hoss: ...

Jesse King: What the hell are you talking about Gorilla?

*Commercial Break:
Tatsunoko V. Capcom
Frosted Mini Wheats
WWCF The Music: Volume 1*


*The New Blackjacks theme hits as one half of the World Tag Team Champions makes his way to the ring to a thunderous ovation. Little Naitch walks into the ring and over to the far side where he is handed a microphone from a production assistant.*

LN: Square, what you did to me last week at King of Wrestlecrap was uncalled for you piece of crap!! What made you think that you could buy me off? In the last year and a half what gave you the impression that I could be bought off? Everything I have achieved in this company I have earned and I would have won the King of Wrestlecrap if it wasn't for your petty attack!


It is obvious to everyone Square that you were afraid of me last week which is why you tried to buy me off. If it wasn't for your attack Square, I am fully confident that I would be the King of Wrestlecrap and the number one contender for the World Heavyweight Title. Now I heard Square talking about how he is pissed off that I cost him the crown and how he is going to use that money he offered me to try to take me out of this company, yadda, yadda, yadda. Square, our current CEO of this company tried the same thing but failed and is now in retirement which is where you will be if you mess with me! Square, why don't you contact Seth and ask him if you can be on his War Games team because I am going to be on The Sam's team so if you want a piece of me so bad then you will be in that match! So Square, if you really want me that bad then you will be in War Games but if you're just all talk then you need to leave me alone. Square, I will be waiting for your response.

*The New Blackjacks theme hits as Little Naitch drops the mic as the fans cheer him.*


*Commercial Break:
KFC
Castrol
wwcfshop.com*


Sparks V. Warrior 2099

"Pull Me Under"

The following contest is scheduled for one-fall! Making his way to the ring, from Sevierville, TN, weighing in at 216 pounds, The Arachnimaniac...SPAARRKS!

Sparks walks out with scar on his shoulder. The crowd is generally cheering. Sparks puts Scar in his clear glass box before going into the ring and posing.


"XxX"

And his opponent from Monterrey, Mexico, weighing in at 220 pounds...WARRRRRIOR 2099!

Warrior 2099 comes out and poses as the crowd boos him. He is getting a lot of heat as he yells at the crowd near the barricade.


The bell rings and right off the bat, Warrior gets in Spark's face, yelling and screaming profanities towards him. Sparks rolls his eyes and seems unphased. Warrior carries on until he pushes Sparks into the ropes. Sparks quickly retaliates with a dropkick. He picks up Warrior slowly and tries for a snap suplex, but Warrior lands behind him and DDT's him from behind. He goes for the cover.

1...
Kickout.

He runs the ropes and drops an elbow. He swiftly gets back up and hits it again. Cover.

1...
Tw-Kickout.

Warrior picks Sparks up and headbutts him. He tries for another, but Sparks ducks and runs the ropes and hits a clothesline. Cover.

1...
Tw-Kickout.

Sparks gets Warrior up and irish whips him, and on the rebound hits an arm drag followed by a leg drop. Cover.

1...
Kickout.

Sparks dumps Warrior to the outside. He tries to Irish whip him into the steps, but Warrior counters and sends him in instead. Sparks's face bounces off the edge of the second steel step with a big metallic bang. The crowd "OOooohhs" at this. Warrior takes Sparks's head and smacks it onto the steps a few times. Sparks slumps to the floor. Warrior tosses him into the barricade before rolling him back into the ring and covering him.

1...
2...
Kickout.

Warrior gets in the refs face and starts shouting profanities at him. Sparks crawls slowly behind Warrior. Before he can roll him up, Warrior quickly turns and kicks him in the head. Warrior laughs and raises his arms to the crowd's dismay. Warrior lifts his knee over Sparks face and drops it, only for it to meet the canvas. Sparks stomps on Warrior's back over and over before being stopped by the referee.

"Welcome To Hell"

Sparks frantically looks around as Amigo's music and lighting fills the arena. The crowd is emanating a lot of heat, but to their (and Sparks's) confusion, there is no Amigo. Suddenly, Warrior locks in his Cobra Clutch on Sparks while Amigo's entrance still plays. Warrior and Sparks go to the floor as the music and confusion fade out. The ref rushes over to Warrior and Sparks and inspects the submission. Sparks is trying as hard as he can to get out of it, but Warrior's grip just keeps getting tighter and tighter. Sparks struggles to the bottom rope and grabs it with all of his strength. Warrior keeps the submission hold locked in as the ref counts.

1!

2!

3!

Warrior lets go, with a smirk on his face. He then looks to the enterance ramp where Amigo's entrance played and nods. He turns to Sparks and drags him to the center of the ring and covers him.

1...
2...
Kickout.

Warrior locks in another cobra clutch as Sparks worms around. He weakly tries to get back up. When he eventually does, Warrior jumps with the cobra clutch still locked in and hits him with a bulldog. Cover.

1...
2...
Thr-kickout.

The crowd cheers loudly to the chargin of Warrior. He runs to each corner and side of the ring shouting spanish at the crowd. Sparks is working his way slowly to his feet. Warrior sees him and runs at him. Sparks ducks and meets Warrior on the rebound with a powerslam. Sparks signals to the crowd as he climps to the top rope. The crowd is on their feet as

Sparks turns around and hits a moonsault. He plays to the crowd even more signaling for the Spark-Te-Plex. All of the sudden, Amigo hits the ring and hammers on Sparks. The referee calls for the bell.

WINNER BY DQ: Sparks

Warrior joins in as the stomp on Sparks all over. After that, Warrior picks up Sparks and holds him in the Clawhold with Sparks's head low in position. Amigo runs at him and hits a devastating Bom-Ba Ye. Amigo and Warrior stand over Sparks's limp body. Amigo lifts Warrior's arm and parades him like a referee would, until Amigo hits Warrior with a low blow. Warrior crumbles down to his knees, and eventually gets met with an equally punishing Bom-Ba Ye. The crowd is giving Amigo lots of heat as he walks seethingly to the entrance ramp. Warrior and Sparks lay broken in the center of the ring as EMT's rush in from the crowd.

My god! What a vicious and unnecessary assault on both men! Amigo must have motives for this!

Ya think?! The spider man was calling out Amigo for a long time! He wanted Amigo and he got it! That's all it was!

Well I can tell ya right now, that was a message. A sick, sadistic message to the young superstar that read "You want me? You got me."


*Commercial Break:
Pop Tarts
GEICO
Quiznos*


Too Black, Too Strong... Damn Right!
Bring Tha Noise - Public Enemy (feat. Anthrax)

DR Jackson comes in his trademark white suit to a shower of boos, he stands at the top of the rank and soaks all of it in. He unbuttons his blazer to reveal his newly won Inter-Forum Championship, the boos continue then turn into M.O.P. chants.

Ladies and Gentlemen, I stand before you as your NEW... wait, scratch that. Because I'm not your champion at all, I didn't do this for you guys. You guys have never even considered giving me a chance, so you can all go to hell. I did this, I won this, I became the NEW Inter-Forum Champion! all for myself, all by myself.

The crowd resume booing, "You Suck" chants are littered throughout, the camera focuses on a "The Black Douchebag-asty" sign.

This is what I'm talking about, I've been a man of my word since day one. Everything I've said I was going to do, everything I said I would achieve, everything I said I would fight for, has all come to fruition. When I came here, I said I'd fight against the minority oppression and do it myself, I said I'd make an impact and last of all I said I'd kick ass and take names all in the name of attitude.

Nothing to do with friends, nothing to do with foes, no enemies and no allies... Because you see I don't judge people for what I THINK they are, I judge everyone here equally... as opponents, as people for me to dominate. As stepping stones to MY GLORY.

Yet, you guys still boo me. For being an honest man who fights for what's right, for fighting against prejudice and viewing everyone as equals. It just proves that you fans will go home and talk to your friends and family, post on internet forums, make Facebook Status updates and tweets about how much you hate racism and how much you feel sorry for those less fortunate... but none of you actually mean it, you just say it to look like a hero infront of your friends, without actually doing anything at all to help the cause you apparently fight for.

I am a man who is fighting to stop all that crap, I've just learnt to fight for a cause so hard to fight for... you have to pull out all the stops and disregard the rules to get the job done. And you boo me. I am THE Black Dynasty, but because of you fans, it's simply a One Man Dynasty.

With this Inter-Forum Championship win, my name will forever gone down in the history books as legend, as a hero. And in time my title reign will become legendary, one that people look back on and say "Wow, he was the man!" then maybe people will realise what I'm fighting for. My time is now, my Era is now.

This is an Era of what's right!, This is an Era where the term "Minority" doesn't exist, This is an Era where people actually fight for what they believe in, This is an Era... of Attitude!

Neither Enemy Nor Friend... Just the NEW INTER-FORUM CHAMPION "DAMN RIGHT" JACKSON!


*Commercial Break:
WWCF Magazine
Burger King
King of WrestleCrap replay*

Jazzman V. Ryan Starshine

Michael Muffer – The following contest is scheduled for one fall and has a 30 minute time limit.

*Hope plays on the PA as Jazzman makes his way out on stage to the crowds jeers, looking noticeably less smug than usual. *

Michael Muffer – Introducing first, from Fulton, New York, and weighing in tonight at 296 pounds, this is Jazzman.

*Jazzman enters the ring and stands in the center, looking out disapprovingly at the surrounding fans.*

Jesse King – Now there’s a strange image Gorilla, Jazzman coming out here without the WWCF World Title around his waist.

Tim Hoss – Indeed it is Jesse. It was close to five months he held the title of WWCF Champion. A whopping 147 days we saw him walk out with that belt. It’s an image we might have to get used to in the meantime Jesse.

Jesse King – That is, for as long as Jazzman will wait to take his belt back. We both know he’s not a patient man Gorilla.

Tim Hoss – And speaking of impatient men, Michael Muffer ladies and gentlemen.

Michael Muffer – And his opponent-

*Supermassive Black Hole plays on the PA. Ryan Starshine enters the stage and the crowd suddenly, and surprisingly erupts in cheers.*

Michael Muffer – Coming to us from Star City, Australia, weighing in tonight at 200 and something pounds, he is the Technical Professional, Ryan Starshine.

*Starshine enters the ring and poses on the corner turnbuckle as the crowd continues their loud support*

Jesse King – What’s going on with these fans Gorilla? Did we enter Bizzaro World?

Tim Hoss – It’s no secret that Ryan Starshine has won over a select few fans in the past month or so. I honestly couldn’t tell you why Jesse. They just seemed take a shine to him.

Jesse King – Pun intended Gorilla?

Tim Hoss – … Nevertheless, this should make an interesting dynamic to the match.

*Referee Spud Johnson checks both competitors for illegal objects and afterwards calls for the bell.*

*The bell rings*

The two competitors slowly circle one another and lock up. Neither is able to push the other back and they unanimously break. They lock up again and again break at a stalemate. They meet hands in a traditional test of strength but still, neither budges. Jazzman breaks the hold and applies a standing headlock. Starshine twists out of it and applies an arm wringer. Jazzman tries to roll out of it, but Starshine drops a knee on the same arm, and transitions into a grounded side headlock. Still in the hold, Jazzman climbs into a kneeling position. He grabs Starshine with a side waistlock and brings both to their feet. Jazzman lifts Starshine off the mat, but is unable to bring him over into a back suplex. He lifts him up again and Starshine breaks his hold and delivers an elbow to the side of the head. Jazzman drops him and Starshine hits the ropes. Jazzman ducks a clothesline. He catches Starshine on the rebound with a nasty tilt a whirl backbreaker. He goes for an early cover.
1…
2…
Starshine kicks out and favours his back.

Jazzman grabs Starshine’s legs for a boston crab and tries to turn him over. Starshine fights back and catches Jazzman with a small package.
1…
2…
Jazzman kicks out with authority.

Both are back to their feet. Jazzman rushes Starshine for his running STO. He grabs him but Starshine reverses the flow and drops Jazzman across his knee. He lifts him back up and drops him again with his Russian backbreaker. He grabs Jazzman’s legs and motions for the Sharpshooter. Jazzman desperately fights him off and grabs the ropes. Starshine eventually breaks before the 5 count and backs up, allowing Jazzman a chance to get back to his feet.

Jazzman instead opts to roll outside and argue with some nearby, jeering fans. Starshine positions himself near to ropes, looking to jump on him. But referee Spud Johnson stops him. Spud leas out through the middle and top rope and orders Jazzman back inside. Starshine takes the chance to hit the opposite ropes and leap over Spud and hit Jazzman with a plancha.

Ryan Starshine – YEAH!

The crowd roars in approval. He tosses Jazzman back inside and follows up with a pinning predicament
1…
2…
Jazzman kicks out.

Starshine quickly goes back to Jazzman’s legs for the sharpshooter. Jazzman desperately fights against the move but Starshine completely turns over and drags him center ring.

Jesse King – Sharpshooter! Can Jazzman escape it this time?

Tim Hoss – He’s in no man’s land Jesse, and the longer he’s in it, the harder it’s going to be to win.

Jesse King – I wouldn’t even say it’s about winning at this point Gorilla. He just needs to survive right now.

Jazzman fights against the hold, but looks hopeless. Starshine leans back as the Referee Spud Johnson knees in front of Jazzman and asks him whether he submits. Jazzman feints tapping, but holds steady. He looks at Spud and motions him to get closer. As he does, Jazzman grabs him by the shirt and pulls him over him, knocking Starshine down and freeing himself. Jazzman crawls to the ropes and drags himself to his feet. He turns to see Starshine caught unawares and rushes him with a running STO. Spud Johnson verbally punishes Jazzman for touching him, but Jazzman ignores the referee. Jazzman picks Starshine up and tosses him overhead with a butterfly suplex. Jazzman climbs to the turnbuckle second rope for his elbow drop. He leaps off, but Starshine rolls away, and Jazzman hits the mat hard. Starshine gets to his feet and climbs the turnbuckle himself. Jazzman quickly intercepts him and crotches him on the turnbuckle. He climbs up the turnbuckle and underhooks both of Starshine’s arms.

Tim Hoss – Jazzman might be going for his patented super butterfly suplex. That’s a guaranteed match ender.

Jesse King – This is it Gorilla, it was a good fight but it’s over for the Technical Professional.

Jazzman clutches tightly, but takes his time. It costs him as Starshine frees his arms and pushes Jazzman back down to the mat. He then leaps off the second rope for an elbow of his own but Jazzman meets him with knees.

Jesse King – Ouch! Talk about a rough landing.

Starshine rolls around on the mat and cradles his arm. Jazzman casually gets back to his feet and positions himself in the corner most opposite his opponent. Starshine moves toward his nearest corner and struggles back to his feet, facing away from the former champion. Jazzman slaps his knees, motioning for his finisher.

Jesse King – I think someone’s about to take the A-Train.

Tim Hoss - This could be it. Jazzman hits this and it could well be all over.

Still facing away from his opponent, Starshine reaches his feet. Just as soon as he does, Jazzman runs forward for the “Taking the A-Train.” Starshine moves at the last second and Jazzman crashes and burns. Starshine drags Jazzman to his feet and drops him with a quick Starshot. He goes for the pin.
1…
2…
Jazzman kicks out.

Starshine picks Starshine back up, but Jazzman drives him into the turnbuckle corner. He backs up and delivers a stiff Yakuza kick, stunning Starshine. He positions him to sit on the top rope and piggybacks him, and hits the backpack stunner. He goes for a pin.
1…
2…
Starshine weakly kicks out.

Jazzman picks Starshine up and positions him for a double arm brainbuster. Starshine drops to his knees, stopping the move. Jazzman clubs him on the back and brings him back standing. Jazzman lifts him, but Starshine fights back and slips free. Jazzman rushes Starshine, but he ducks his attack. Jazzman hits the turnbuckle, and Starshine smacks him with a sudden superkick. Jazzman slumps down and Starshine delivers a second superkick. He grabs Jazzman out from the corner and preps him for the Starblind.

Jesse King – No one kicks out of the Starblind.

Just as Starshine tries to hit the move, Jazzman slips out and schoolboys him, also grabbing nearby ropes.
1…
2…
3

Michael Muffer – The winner of this match, Jazzman.

*Jazzman slips out of the ring and quickly makes his way back up the ramp as the crowd boos in disapproval. Starshine sits on the mat, looking disappointed, and frustrated. He stands up and motions for a mic.*

Ryan Starshine – Hey Jazzman! Jazzman, hold on a second!

*Jazzman stops at the top of stage by the arena entrance. The crowd begins chanting “that was bulls***.” Jazzman looks around the arena and smirks.*

Ryan Starshine – You know something? This place, this company, the WWCF is where you can see the wrestling stars of tomorrow. The WWCF is also the place where you can see the wrestling stars who have already made worldwide names for themselves. So you can expect the very best competition any night you step into the ring.

Tim Hoss – A lot of truths being spouted by the Technical Professional.

Ryan Starshine – Jazzman, I can’t claim that you didn’t beat me tonight. I can’t claim that I wasn’t pinned. But I can claim that you haven’t got the best of me. Because no matter what game plan I came up with tonight, no matter how much effort I put into this match. In the end it all came down to pure, scrub tactics.

Jesse Kings – Scrub tactics, the biggest insult on the WWCF.com message board community.

Ryan Starshine – I won’t take away the fact that you’re a terrific talent Jazzy. You’re the longest reigning WWCF Champion. You’ll probably hold that belt again someday. But the fact is Jazzman, all of them *points towards the crowd*, they’re all right, that was undoubtedly bulls***.

*Jazzman scoffs and waves Starshine off before making his way backstage. From inside the ring, Starshine watches him off and shakes his head. He drops the mic and begins to make his way backstage. Suddenly he stops and slides back into the ring.*

Ryan Starshine – One more thing. Let me just put all this bitterness to the side and say one thing. You guys all know I’m a rotten human being. I don’t hide it, it’s who I am. But from the bottom of that little black hole I call my heart, you guys were truly great tonight. In all actuality, you guys were so loud that for one little second I even thought… maybe I want to be a good guy.

*Starshine drops the mic again and exits to the back as the crowd loudly cheers for him.*


*Commercial Break:
Taco Bell
Truth
Tropicana*


“Men on the Thunderstruck Mountain” blasts over the PA as Evil M and Yellow Jacket come to the ring. The chorus of boos almost overtakes the new theme music. M and YJ soak up the boos with pleasure, waving off the fans. They enter the ring, as they demand Michael Muffer get them mics. He does so. With a huge grin on his face, YJ starts to talk.

Yellow Jacket: “January 25th, 2010 will live in infamy. On that night, a new King was crowned, new champions were had, as were you fans. At King of Wrestlecrap, Evil M and I pulled the greatest swerve in the history of the WWCF. On that historic night, we tricked each and every one of you.

For the past few weeks, we had you all believing that me and Evil M were at war. That M hated my guts. We even had you eating out of the palm of our hands. Every time that either me or my good friend used a weapon, you all cheered it on, despite your supposed hatred for us. You helped us in proving a point. That the fans and the lowlifes in the back are nothing but a group of moronic hypocrites.”

Boys and girls, it's story time! Once upon a time, there was a man named Evil Masked wordlifeecw and he was just like you. Misguided. Bloodthirsty. Everything he did, he did for you people.

But then he met a man named Yellow Jacket. Yellow Jacket wanted Evil Masked wordlifeecw to see the error of his hardcore ways. They had a match. And Evil Masked wordlifeecw paid the price for his violent choices. He suffered a broken arm.

But I want to make one thing perfectly clear. This man *points at YJ* Did not break my arm! You people broke my arm!

The crowd boos Evil M, who just smirks before continuing.

Yes, it was you. All of you. We are all, by nature, bloodthirsty creatures. We can't control how we start out. But we can change! Like I've changed.

You see, my friend here, Yellow Jacket. He was the only person who cared enough to come and see while I was recovering from surgery. And him and me, we had a good, long talk. And because of that talk, I was able to see the light. Everything, the the hardcore matches, the weapons, the mask, I did it all for you people! And what did I get in return? Pain. Misery. Suffering. All so I could make you chant, "HOLY -" no. No, I'm not going to say it. That's what you people want.

I'm not here to please you anymore. I now have a new goal here in the WWCF. To wipe out hardcore wrestling and everything it stands for! With my friend Yellow Jacket by my side, The Truth Coalition will be unstoppable!

And it all starts tonight. See, we spoke to the lovely Commissioner Morton and she arranged a little debut match for us. So let's get our opponents out here!

Generic rock music plays as two men in plain black tights walk out.

Michael Muffer - Ladies and gentlemen, this match is set for one fall, with a 30 minute time limit!

Introducing first, at a total combined weight of 459 pounds, Andy Davis and Josh Tucker!

And their opponents, already in the ring, at a total combined weight of 539 pounds, Yellow Jacket and Evil M, The Truth Coalition!

Tim Hoss - Well, it appears we have an impromptu match here, Jess!

Jesse King - Let's see how The Truth Coalition does in their first outing as a team.

The referee signals for the bell. YJ and Davis start the match. They tie up and YJ takes Davis down to the mat. He pulls him back up and suplexes him, then makes the cover.

1!
Tucker breaks it up!

Evil M runs in and lays Tucker out with a chokeslam! Davis is back up, but M catches him! He brings him up, looking for the Journey to Hell! He spins him around, once, twice, three times, he brings him down... Yeloow Jacket hit's Davis with the Sting, causing the young man's head to snap back! Cover!

1!
2!
3!

Michael Muffer - Here are your winners, Yellow Jacket and Evil M, The Truth Coalition!

EMTs run out to check on Davis as the Coalition celebrate their win.

*Commercial Break:
TJ Max
Heinz Ketchup
New WWCF Action Figures*


Tim Hoss - And now it’s time for our main event!

Jesse King - Let’s take it to Michael Muffer!


Main Event: Champion V. Champion: Aaron Enigma V. “Damn Right“ Jackson

"Gorilla" Tim Hoss: We'd like to take this time to welcome the King of Wrestlecrap, the self-proclaimed Paparazzi Primadonna, Viva Los Bio Dome to the announcers table.
"Hollywood King" Viva Los Bio Dome: Please, Timothy. "King Viva" will do just fine, thank you.

Jesse King: Why are you talking like that?

King Viva: Who, Me? Talking like what, Jesse? I am merely portraying the hierarchy in a respectable manner. I dare not disrespect this crown.


Jesse King: Hmph... Okay.


*Bring Tha Noise*

Michael Muffer - West Philadelphia, born and raised. He is your Inter-forum Champion. Weighing in at 296 pounds and a height of 6'5", "Damnnnn RIGHT" Jackson!

Jesse King: There he goes! The Black Dynasty! He had M.O.P's number and he took his belt last weekend in a dominating display of strength. What's your take on him... King Viva?

King Viva: I'm glad you asked, Jesse. You see, I beat him pretty easily on Niteraw just two weeks ago. Therefore, reason stands that I am not only better than the Inter-Forum champion, but the greatest King that has ever lived!

"Gorilla" Tim Hoss: So, you're saying you could win the Inter-Forum Championship belt easily?

King Viva: Do you dare not listen when the King speaks? May not those exact words been spoken, Timothy, but they were highly implied. You musn't anger me any further, for I shall call the King's Cabinet to session and be you eliminated from your position as Color Analyst.

"Gorilla" Tim Hoss: You don't have the power or ability to do that.

*Make A Move*

Michael Muffer - Hailing from Concord, New Hampshire, fighting out of Chicago, IL weighing in at 256 pounds and coming in at a height of 6'3". He is The "Head Detective", Your WWCF World Heavyweight Champion, Aaron ENIGMA!

Jesse King: Here he comes... King Viva! The man you face in just three short weeks at Ernest Goes to Wargames. Are you nervous? Do you think you have what it takes to beat this man?

King Viva: The King sees an unfortunate topple of the Enigma regime come Ernest Goes to Wargames. It will be a sad time for him, but King Viva believes that you asked the wrong question. The question is not if I have what it takes to beat Aaron, but if Aaron has what it takes to beat me. I, fortunately, am riding a liquid hot wave of momentum, and I see no end in sight for the Reign of King Viva.

"Gorilla" Tim Hoss: Well, to be frank, Aaron toes a fine line between order and chaos. You basically swim on the chaotic side. Do you think your styles will clash?

King Viva: Clash?! I laugh at the prospect. For centuries, Kings did whatever it took to protect his regime. Forget the victor, to the king goes the spoils. Unfortunately for that man, the spoils happen to be his newly acquired Championship belt. The man I have become is a man who will do whatever it takes to win. This will not change during my match with Aaron.

*King Viva removes his crown.*

"Hollywood" Viva Los Bio Dome: Hey, lets start this f***ing match already. I got classy women to tend to.

Jesse King: What happened to the king talk?

"Hollywood" Viva Los Bio Dome: What the f*** are you talking about?


Aaron and Jackson lock up in the center. Jackson pushes Aaron back to the corner and ref calls for a break. Jackson breaks but punches Aaron in the gut. He grabs Aaron and whips him across into the other corner. He charges for a clothesline but Aaron ducks it. Jackson turns around to be met by a punch from Aaron. Aaron pushes Jackson back before Jackson knees him in the stomach. He moves to whip Aaron but Aaron counters and sends Jackson into the ropes. Aaron hits Jackson with an arm drag and holds it into an armbar. Jackson quickly gets up though and elbows Aaron in the face before slamming him to the ground and going for the pin.

1...Aaron kicks out!

Jesse King: A quick kick out by Aaron there. Proof that he will not be taken down easily.

"Hollywood" Viva Los Bio Dome: He looks sick. I've got the perfect prescription. A spoonful of Purple Sticky Punch oughta do the trick. What do you announcer douchebags see in this Dick? All I see is a guy who pretends to be the good guy while taking liberties that a good guy shouldn't, or wouldn't take. He has no respect for anybody and yet he gets the crowd firmly behind him. I, on the other hand, look great, am the best fighter on this roster of losers, and yet I'm taken completely for granted.

"Gorilla" Tim Hoss: I'm playing the worlds smallest violin right now.

Jackson moves to pick Aaron up but Aaron counters with a punch to the stomach. He quickly lifts Jackson up and hits a vertical suplex. Aaron picks up Jackson and throws him into the corner. He charges and hits Jackson with a spear and follows up with a DDT. Aaron goes for the pin.

1.....2....Jackson kicks out!

"Gorilla" Tim Hoss: Uh oh, Aaron has Jackson on the ropes now. Does Jackson have the stamina to keep up with the Head Detective?

"Hollywood" Viva Los Bio Dome: Jackson doesn't need stamina, s*** for brains. He's got pure brute strength. Trust me, I know. I had trouble lifting him up a couple times in our match. I got that son of a bitch up for the Bio-DOME! though. It was a beautiful site.

Jesse King: Is all you ever do is talk about yourself, Viva?

"Hollywood" Viva Los Bio Dome: Watch your tongue, you little douche. Who else in this company is worth talking about? I party with stars. I f*** stars. I'm a bonafide star. I've been on the cover of People Magazine, guy. I'm the real f***in' deal.

"Gorilla" Tim Hoss: Yeah, I meant to talk to you about that. Who's your agent? My wife is having a child soon, maybe he can help get us a good deal on exclusive baby photos for People.

"Hollywood" Viva Los Bio Dome: My agent is mine only, Timmy. Dibs, bitch. Back off.

Aaron moved to pick up Jackson but Jackson grabs his pants and throws Aaron through the ropes onto the floor. Jackson moves out of the ring and slams Aaron into the ring post before grabbing his dazed opponent and throwing him in the ring. Jackson gets back in the ring and locks Aaron in a headlock. Aaron desperately tries to break the hold. Jackson wrenches it as hard as he can. Aaron gets to his feet and punches Jackson in the stomach. Jackson breaks the hold and Aaron gets to his feet.

Jesse King: It looks like you got it right, Viva. Jackson has used his strength to get a little momentum shift.

"Hollywood" Viva Los Bio Dome: Wow, thank you for the commentary Captain Obvious. No wonder our ratings keep crashing. Who the f*** hired this guy?

Jesse King: Well, I was put in place by standing Commissioner Seth Drakin, although I've been in the company since it's incarnation.

"Hollywood" Viva Los Bio Dome: That explains everything. Nobody gives a s*** about your life story though, Jess. Shut the f*** up and watch the match.

Jackson tries to clothesline him but Aaron ducks under it. On the rebound Aaron sets up for a back body drop but Jackson kicks him in the sternum. Jackson follows up by lifting Aaron up for the High Attitude. Aaron squirms out of it though. He follows up with a quick reverse roundhouse. Jackson turns right into it and gets nailed. Aaron quickly lifts Jackson up and hits the Brilliant Deduction before falling on top of him.

1.....2.....3!

Michael Muffer - Your winner, The "Head Detective" Aaron Enigma!

"Gorilla Tim Hoss: Brilliant Deduction and the win! Aaron Enigma proves just why he is at the top of this company with an impressive victory over our Inter-Forum champion!

Jesse King: You're exactly right, there, Tim! Or dare I say, you're "Damn Right!" about that!

"Hollywood" Viva Los Bio Dome: Oh god, gag me with a f***ing spoon. I've had enough of this suckfest.

"Hollywood" Viva Los Bio Dome takes off his headset and slides into the ring. He instantly runs over Aaron Enigma from behind with a running lariot.

Jesse King: What the HELL does Viva think he's doing? He can't treat our champion like that!

Viva grabs Aaron and hits him with a Falcon Arrow. He picks up Aaron and pushes him into a corner. He begins raining down on Aaron's face with punch after punch.

"Gorilla" Tim Hoss: I've counted at least 20 punches! Where are the referees? Where's security?! This is assault! You can't take advantage of a tired man like this!

Viva pulls him out of the corner and knees him in the stomach. He lifts him up for the Bio-Dome.

Jesse King: NO! This isn't right! He can't get away with this!

M.O.P. and Jonathan Michaels come sprinting down the ramp and slide into the ring. They hit Viva in the back, averting the Bio-DOME! and Viva rolls out of harms way and grabs a microphone.

"Hollywood" Viva Los Bio Dome: So I guess that's it. I guess I'll never have the opportunity to get the upper hand on you, Aaron, because The Equalizers will always have your back. I guess I should just leave well enough alone, or...

*We're Not Gonna Take It*

The Heavy Metal Express walk onto the stage with Koda in tow. All three run for the ring, slide in, and begin brawling with the Equalizers. Meanwhile, Viva slides in and hits a brawling Aaron Enigma with a C-c-combo Breaker!

Jesse King: What a vile and reprehensible combo breaker. What the hell is going on here? Why is The Heavy Metal Express helping Viva Los Bio Dome? What do they have to gain in this?

"Gorilla" Tim Hoss: I don't know, but that is a dangerous combination if you ask me. I don't like the looks of this.

Viva helps the Heavy Metal Express take care of M.O.P and Jonathon Michaels and Viva instructs Headbanger Man and Koda to hold Aaron up by his arms.

"Hollywood" Viva Los Bio Dome: What if I told you, Aaron, that The Heavy Metal Express were looking for a lead singer? What if I then told you, that after speaking extensively with my agent, they decided that I was the most fitting candidate? What would you think about that?

My brand new buddy and confidant D-Day Dave has a few words he'd like to say to you, pal.

D-Day Dave: I know a lot of people are going to ask me why I think Viva Los Bio Dome is going to make an excellent edition to the band. Well, it's simple. You can only send your demo to so many record labels, play so many shows in dive bars and basements across the US. You can only try to get your name out there to a certain extent before you grow tired of watching it get stepped on by horrible copycat bands.

Day in, day out, I watch bands with a fraction of the talent The Heavy Metal Express possesses get signed to multi-year, multi-million dollar contracts. Then I see someone like Viva get on the cover of People Magazine for becoming the King of Wrestlecrap. Why did he get such good fortune? I'll tell you why, because he's a f***ing winner. And to the winner goes the spoils in this world.

You can call me a sell out, I really don't give a s*** what any of you people think. You've given me nothing despite asking for the opportunity to rock your worlds. Lukewarm responses from fans led me to one conclusion. The only way to get money is not by being loyal to your fans but by taking the respect you deserve, something Viva has done since day one.

I now present to you the dawning of a new era in rock and roll. Instead of climing the charts, we will climb the competitive ladder. We will not stop until every piece of gold in this company is around our waists. We are Heavy Metal Hollywood, and if you step to us, we will rock you out.

Jesse King: Heavy Metal Hollywood? What? Are they forming a faction? A bond through one common goal? To win every belt in the WWCF?

"Gorilla" Tim Hoss: It is possible, Jesse. Viva's gunning for the WWCF Championship belt, Headbanger and Dave just won #1 Contendership for the Tag Team Titles last night on heat. Koda has an outside chance at the Inter-Forum title.

Jesse King: No! The very thought of that miscreant Viva getting what he wants makes me virtually ill!

"Hollywood" Viva Los Bio DomeIt's unfortunate you had to get your little friends involved, Aaron. It really didn't have to be this way, I would have had a lot more pleasure beating you all by myself. Now, not only do I have the benefit of better looks, more talent, and more skill, but now I have the strength in numbers. Me and my friends are going to look so good putting you out of your misery. What possible advantage could you have over me now? Your cunning wit?

Viva Los Bio Dome Laughs.

"Hollywood" Viva Los Bio Dome: That's right, Aaron. You've met your match, and you met him right after you won your belt. For shame.

Viva Los Bio Dome motions them to open up Aaron's midsection. He plants a vicious kick to Aaron's gut and then prepares for the Purple Sticky Punch.

Jesse King: For those of you with children watching at home, we advise you turn their heads from the screen. What you are about to see is a vile, disgusting act from one of the biggest pieces of garbage in the WWCF.

With nowhere to go, Aaron takes a Purple Sticky Punch right in the face. The impact is heard through the arena.

Viva Los Bio Dome tells Headbanger and Koda to drop Aaron. Viva sets Aaron's unconscious body for the Bio-DOME! M.O.P and Jonathon Michaels try to intervene, but Dave, Headbanger, and Koda keep the two men at bay. Viva Los Bio Dome hits Aaron with the Bio-DOME, and the cameras zoom in on Aaron's face.

"Gorilla' Tim Hoss: What has Viva done? What is in store for him next week? Does Seth Drakin have anything to say about what just happened?

Jesse King: All I know is, Aaron is not the type of person that will take this vicious assault and move on. Viva just pulled the pin out of a grenade and we're going to see it explode next week on NiteRAW!

Viva Los Bio Dome and the rest of Heavy Metal Hollywood exit the ring and head up the ramp as NiteRAW comes to a close.

Writing Credits: The Sam, YellowJacket, BRB, Little Naitch, Sparks, “Damn Right” Jackson, Starshine, Evil M, Aaron Enigma, Viva Los Bio Dome, and D-Day Dave